Relationships

The Redefinition of Marriage: An Exercise in Moral and Cultural Suicide

In 1993, Sen. Daniel P. Moynihan (D- N.Y.) published "Defining Deviancy Down ." Moynihan started from Emile Durkheim's proposition that there is a limit to the amount of deviant behavior any community can "'afford to recognize' and that, accordingly, we have been re-defining deviancy so as to exempt much conduct previously stigmatized, and also quietly raising the 'normal' level in categories where behavior is now abnormal by any earlier standard. This redefining has evoked fierce resistance from defenders of ‘old' standards, and accounts for much of the present 'cultural war. . .

Unspoken ExpectationsPremium Content


…get me in a lot of trouble.

I got disappointed this week.

Disclaimer: I’m only telling this story because I think it contains some valuable lessons. The details don’t matter—this is about my personal failure, nothing else.

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A couple of years ago I was invited to be a very small part of a project. No contracts or financial commitments, just a small once-per-week contribution. Four other people, all much more qualified and credible, also joined. I felt pleased and honored to be included.

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Loving the Unlovable

Matthew 22:37-40 NKJV
Jesus said to him, "'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets."

In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul admonishes us to seek love over all things, even over faith:

Do the Faults of Others Bother You?Premium Content


There is a duty of fault-finding. The Master Himself teaches it. In the Sermon on the Mount, He makes it very plain. We must note carefully, however, where the duty begins. We are to look first after our own faults. "Why do you look at the mote that is in your brother's eye--but do not consider the beam that is in your own eye?"

We must consider the beam that is in our own eye!

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I Have Forgiven My Husband's Adultery but He is DistantPremium Content

Ask Angie: I forgave husband of infidelity and adultery now he won't talk to me nor sleep close to me what am I doing wrong?

Marriage Guidance: How can forgiveness be wrong? Forgiving others their trespasses against us is always the right thing to do, even if they continue trespassing against us. "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us". All you can do is your part in the marriage and it looks like you are attempting to do that by forgiving your husband. You didn't tell me if he has repented of adultery or not so I can only speculate that he has not.

Let's talk about ways in which we can heal ourselves and restore marriage after adultery.

Make God First in Marriage

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"Excuses" - Workshop TranscriptPremium Content

note: Members may discuss this workshop in the Message Boards HERE

Before we get started, please consider visiting this link and printing

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Putting Aside Arrogance and Embracing Humility

Luke 12:16-21 NKJV
Then He spoke a parable to them, saying: "The ground of a certain rich man yielded plentifully. And he thought within himself, saying, 'What shall I do, since I have no room to store my crops?' So he said, 'I will do this: I will pull down my barns and build greater, and there I will store all my crops and my goods. And I will say to my soul, "Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years; take your ease; eat, drink, and be merry." ' But God said to him, 'Fool! This night your soul will be required of you; then whose will those things be which you have provided?' So is he who lays up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God.">

Our Lives Should be More Like JazzPremium Content

I don’t know much about jazz except that I usually like it, especially live. I’m thinking that our lives might be a little richer if they were a little more like jazz.

Jazz music is sort of unscripted. Each song has a basic melody and sometimes words, but the performance is spontaneous. Real jazz isn’t rehearsed like a lot of other music—it’s more of a live interaction between the musicians. They practice and develop their individual skills, but the music happens when they play off one another.

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How Can I Forgive When It Hurts So Bad?Premium Content

I know it hurts. It hurts so bad we don’t want to forgive. The pain is unbearable at times and all we really want to do is get revenge, or keep wallowing in the pain that our feelings give us and remain resentful and angry. This is such a common problem in marriage today, so I feel it is worth more than rubies and gold to keep writing about it.

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Video: How to Forgive a Spouse of AdulteryPremium Content

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