I have selected Communication, Compassion, Compromise, Commitment, and Christ as five foundations of a great marriage. I believe they all work together to bring harmony and love for couples in marriage.
COMMUNICATION
Five Ways To A Great Marriage Read More »
Okay, I’m attempting to simmer down. I just finished another viewing of the animated Disney classic, “Sleeping Beauty.”
Like a lot females out there, I have a complicated love/hate view of this fairytale princess depiction.
Over the years, I have bought into, absorbed, aspired to be like and have been resentful of this ingénue archetype. I have run the gamut of emotions, largely because of the all-important beauty factor which is mandatory for our young princess heroine.
It was all I could do to get through this latest viewing of the film.
For, right off the bat, we have our staple Disney music, chiming in, emphasizing just how beautiful our “Sleeping Beauty” is…
The Toxic Gender Role Dance Read More »
Some people seem to have a genius for making others miserable! They are continually touching sensitive hearts, so as to cause pain. They are always saying things which sting and irritate. If you have any bodily defect, they never see you without in some crude way, making you conscious of it. If any relative or friend of yours has done some dishonorable thing, they seem to take a cruel delight in constantly referring to it when speaking with you. They lack all delicacy of feeling, having no eye for the sensitive things in others, which demand gentleness of treatment.
Thoughtfulness is the reverse of all this. It simply does not do the things which thoughtlessness does. It avoids the painful subject. It never alludes to a man’s clubfoot or humpback, nor ever casts an eye at the defect, nor does anything to direct attention to it or to make the man conscious of it. It respects your sorrow–and refrains from harshly touching your wound. It has the utmost kindliness of feeling and expression. A truly thoughtful person, is one who never needlessly gives pain to another.
Thoughtless or Thoughtful ? Read More »
I recently caught a viral video of a turtle repeatedly head butting a cat. The feline, annoyed, swishing its tail, eventually got up and moved. And the turtle was on its way. Is it a lesson in adversity? In persistence? In forging ahead, despite negative feedback?
Other people hold mirrors up to us. And a significant mirror came to me in the form of a critic to my beloved baby, my book, “Thin Enough.”
They say we’re supposed to embrace the criticism and the ugly truth. Well saying that, doing that and feeling great about it don’t necessarily happen all at the same time. But criticism and unpleasant comments still occur, often while we’re in the middle of something as challenging as recovery from a compulsion, addiction or disorder.
Another’s Critique is Not the Final Say Read More »
It is a challenge to become an active listener until you understand how years of denial, manipulating others, chemical use and other negative consequences have become the foundation of your distorted listening. You have become deaf to the reality of what you hear. Your addiction has become a filter that prevents you from hearing the truth. People talk about what you have become. You do not make sense when you talk so nobody listens to you.
Listening becomes a threat and you convince yourself that nobody will understand you because they will not listen to your version of your life as an addict or alcoholic. When you are deaf, to the reality of addiction, the delusions and paranoid ideas you create in you head become the reality that is your life. You become the delusions and distortion because you
Learning to Listen Read More »
Do it yourself marriage counseling with God in the forefront is exceptional counsel because it really works! You just need to learn how to work it. Let me ask you a question. What are you now basing your marriage on? Where are you going now for the answers you may need to resolve your marital upheavals? The answer is most likely friends, family, pastors, books, ebooks, etc, or for very few of you, mainstream marriage counseling. Am I right?
We have to know WHO WE ARE before we can choose the right kind of counseling and marital guidance.
God Based Marriage Counseling Read More »
A friend of mine who is experiencing some painful family issues has repeatedly asked herself the “why” questions.
Why is this happening to me?
Why am I being treated like this?
Why is my loved one acting in such an ugly manner?
She has been blindsided by a situation and a relationship she never dreamed was possible, rife with betrayal, deception and slander. This was once a close, bonded relationship, one filled with unconditional love and trust.
So, the events over the last few years were a definite shock.
Why is this happening to me? Read More »
I think most great marriages are based upon principled acts of love. What does that mean? Real love is a verb, which means to love others takes effort. Principled acts of love can actually grow deeper and richer with the age of the marriage, especially if the marriage has been led under the wisdom of God. A principled act of love is all about choosing to love the person you married and doing it with wisdom.
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:9, 10 NIV
Some people have this preconceived idea that love is something that makes you feel all giddy and euphoric inside. In reality, how many couples after having been married five or ten years still share that euphoric feeling with each other? So in retrospect when that preconceived or learned idea gets squashed out in left field, which will happen, people tend to think they are not “in love” with their spouse anymore. And the next thing you know they are looking for a new partner. But if love is a choice, which I believe it is, and we choose to do those things that are loving it will make us feel more loving too.
What happens to couples in marriage who believe love should feel a certain way? Society has taught that
Every year 4,774,000 women in the USA are victims of physical violence.The number of American troops killed in Afghanistan and Iraq between 2001 and 2012 totaled 6,488 However, the number of American women murdered by current or ex male partners during the same timeframe was nearly double that amount at 11,766.
Every nine seconds in the USA, a woman is assaulted or beaten. One of them could be your sister, your cousin, your neighbor, or your best friend.
Domestic Violence: Your Family & Friends Read More »
We can restore marriage when we come to realize that marriage must be based upon the design of who created it. What one creates, one also controls. It has always been that way. This means couples need 
to stop trying to control each other and give “it” to God. Stop fighting and learn to love. Controlling each other is improper behavior, but working with each other as a team is appropriate. First, before marriage can be restored, inner healing must take place.
Heal yourself! Are you spiritually stunted because of something controlling the person inside of you? Maybe you are addicted to drugs or alcohol, sex, food, negative feelings, emotions, or maybe you are too proud to see God. These things literally stunt us emotionally and spiritually. Only when we let the hurt stop controlling our thoughts and actions, can we finally let it go and give it to God. so then, it is God who actually heals us, we just allow it to finally happen.
God will actually take away our suffering if
You Can Restore Your Marriage! Read More »
