Self-Examination

Teeter Totter Thinking


When I was a kid, I loved the teeter totter. Because of my weight issues, however, I was acutely aware of how my weight differed from most kids. The teeter totter was the scale; whoever was the heavier had the strength to hold the other occupant stranded in mid- air for however long he/she desired.

And usually that person was me, much to my dismay. After all, I wanted to be the dainty princess of sugar and spice and everything nice; I didn’t want to be a bruiser or a brute.

I had a completely distorted and unhealthy perspective. And one incident, in particular, captured it.

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Get Back On Your Feet Because You Still Have To Eat

“Get Back On Your Feet Because You Still Have To Eat”

This little catchy phrase is a great motivator if you need to remind yourself why it is important to look for work and remember to keep your eye on the prize. Jesus never fails. Even when it seems like you are going to walk off into the abyss and you cannot see no way, God will make a way. You have to remember to ask yourself where is your faith in God.

Psalm 118:8 KJV
It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man.

First things first when you start to look for work is to remember what you can do and what you are good at doing. Remember that recovery takes one day at a time and in the beginning you have to heal in all areas of your life. When it feels as if you will not be able to reach your goal it is time to slow down, take a deep breath and remember your God given strengths and talents.

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How is it working for you? Is Jesus not enough?

How is it working for you?

Is Jesus not enough? Does what He accomplished on Calvary fall short? Can we add anything to our salvation? Can we study enough to figure a strategic path to wholeness? Does doctrinal purity overcome sin and fleshly appetites? Does the Magnificent Love of God fall short in wooing us into pure inner motives? Is the Great Grace of Jesus a ‘nice’ and ‘sweet’ ideology? God forbid!

“Because helping people control their flesh through human effort and adherence to rules is not only a thankless but never ending task, most leaders employ any strategy that promises even a measure of success. Guilt, shame, condemnation, and threats in God’s name are presented by the enemy as viable options. The church has swallowed this lie hook, line and sinker!” (Pg. 106 Pure Grace: The Life Changing Power of Uncontaminated Grace)

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Am I a Talker or a Doer?

Proverbs 18:6-7, 9 NRSV
“A fool’s lips bring strife,
and a fool’s mouth invites a flogging.
The mouths of fools are their ruin,
and their lips a snare to themselves. . . .
One who is slack in work is close kin to a vandal.”

We talk a lot. We text. We phone. We email. We chat. Unfortunately, we tend not to talk to those who matter most. Have you ever gone to a restaurant and noticed that people are texting or talking on their cell phones and ignoring the people they’re eating dinner with? What we say, when we say it, to whom we say it… all of those things are important. We need to talk. But we need to choose to whom and when. Wrong talking brings ruin.

One of the reasons that texting, phoning, and the Internet has become so attractive is the characteristic of anonymity. We will say something to someone who is hidden from view much easier than we will say it to them in person. Evil loves the darkness; it loves to be hidden: “And this is the judgment, that the light has come into the world, and people loved darkness rather than light because their deeds were evil. For all who do evil hate the light and do not come to the light, so that their deeds may not be exposed” (John 3:19-20 NRSV).

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Vain Imagination (Self-esteem)

Vain Imagination

As a little girl, I had one of those pink girly hand mirrors.


Its back had a girl’s face on it, a pretty one, naturally. She had blue eyes, blond hair and an upturned nose. It wasn’t exactly diversity.

Years later, I think back to playing with (looking at) that mirror; which side was more harmful to what eventually became my bad self- image. Was it that girl’s face- or was it my own face staring back at me?

Vanity’s not really a great Christian character trait…

I have not sat with vain persons, neither will I go in with dissemblers. Psalms 26:4

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Are You Eyeing Some Envy?

A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones. Proverbs 14:30

I love Sophia Loren; I love Jane Mansfield. So, when I saw a photograph of them together, the fan in me squealed. Perhaps you’re familiar with the image. It’s the two stars, seated together at a table at some Hollywood event. Sophia Loren’s eyes look off to the side, staring at Jayne Mansfield’s cleavage. Could this be, perhaps, an example of envy being photographed?

We know both women are popular culture and beauty icons; they’re sex symbols. Ms. Loren, to this day, is an embodiment of exotic beauty. How many of us have unsuccessfully tried to achieve that dramatic “Sophia look,” only to poke ourselves in the pupil with the liquid eye liner?

And, the late Ms. Mansfield’s ample bust, supposedly measuring anywhere from 40D to 46 D, is frequently mentioned and even compared to that of Marilyn Monroe’s figure. How many of us have stuffed our bras with tissue to look just like her? (Somehow, we never did).

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Discovering Real Love

Writing to those loved by God the Father, called and kept safe by Jesus Christ. Relax, everything’s going to be all right; rest, everything’s coming together; open your hearts, love is on the way!…But you, dear friends, carefully build yourselves up in this most holy faith by praying in the Holy Spirit, staying right at the center of God’s love, keeping your arms open and outstretched, ready for the mercy of our Master, Jesus Christ. This is the unending life, the real life! Jude 1b-2, 20-21, The Message


We are always changed by our experiences of being loved by God. As we Practice His Presence we will be gently challenged as to what we believe about love. Our wounds associated with love will be “being healed” as we practice his presence.

The first front of healing in our journey as Son’s and Daughter’s; is to become empowered to more fully receive love from Father. “Be Loved!”

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Back to School (Eating Disorder Awareness Education)

This back to school season always strikes me with concern. Eating disorders are often triggered by the college experience. Statistics show some startling realities:

“As many as 10% of college women suffer from a clinical or nearly clinical eating disorder, including 5.1% who suffer from bulimia nervosa.
Studies indicate that by their first year of college, 4.5 to 18% of women and 0.4% of men have a history of bulimia…”
(The National Institute of Mental Health, National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders)


Indeed, it was my reality. As a child and a teenager who always struggled with her weight, I determined college to be my “reinvention.” If I could just be thin, I could be a new, better person. And so, oh, so slowly, I descended into eating disorders. I discuss it in my book, “Thin Enough: My Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death of an Eating Disorder.”

It started as a diet. However, it didn’t stop there. Eventually I was engulfed in anorexia, culminating in an unhealthy low weight of eighty pounds, not to mention, weakness and dizziness just to name a couple of health issues I encountered. Furthermore, that anorexic condition eventually morphed into another dangerous disorder, bulimia; I gained one hundred plus pounds within a number of months. And, with that rapid weight gain, I experienced heart fluttering, shortness of breath and suicidal thoughts. Simply stated-I was miserable, unhealthy and out of control.

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Hitting Bottom – A Neely O’Hara Moment: “God-d-d-d-d!!!”

I recently watched the cult classic, “Valley of the Dolls,” the chick film based on Jacqueline Suzanne’s legendary book. The film took the 1960’s by storm for its dish-y look at starlets in Hollywood as they deal with fame, sex and drugs.

One of its lead characters, Neely O’Hara, played by Patty Duke, indeed, travels down a rocky, highly dramatic and addicted road of stardom and self-destruction. It’s drama queen chick film at its epic best!

And, at the end of the wild ride, Neely suffers the damage done to her acting career, via her drug addiction. She is reduced to being in an alley, at night, screaming, “God-d-d-d-d!”

Yeah. I believe one calls this “hitting bottom.”

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Never Give Up! (Part 2)

(see: Part 1)

15 The LORD God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and care for it. 16But the LORD God gave him this warning: “You may freely eat any fruit in the garden 17 except fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat of its fruit, you will surely “die” (forfeit a living/intimate relationship with God). Genesis 2:15-17, NLT

Now, although Adam and his wife were both naked, neither of them felt any shame. Genesis 2:25, NLT

Shame was born in dis-obedience. And so was mankind’s propensity to lean upon flawed understanding and call it “wisdom or knowledge”. These are the result of eating of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil! Their/our eyes were opened to what they weren’t equipped to understand or process.

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