CIR KBs

Christians in Recovery Knowledge Base article

Slaves to Jesus or Slaves to Sin?

How can I stop sinning? It seems like I am always confessing my sins and yet they never go away. What am I doing wrong?

This is a really loaded question, especially since we are not perfect individuals and we are all sinners. We will always have sin in our life and we will sin. But this certainly doesn’t mean that some of us are not good people. It means that we don’t understand the logistics of sin and how it all works in our life.

There are some people who actually think they never sin. But this is not true. The idea that one does not sin is absolutely ridiculous. Even if a person were locked up in a closet unable to get out and go anywhere, he would be sinning with his thoughts! The person who thinks he does not sin would also then believe he doesn’t have to pray, confess and repent either.

Still, there are others who continue practicing the same sin over and over and because they confess that sin over and over they think they are Christ Ones and are going to heaven. But this is not true either.

What is true is that some of us sin more than others and some of us cannot stop sinning, while others may go days without sinning. Sometimes we sin and we don’t even know that we have sinned! We are all sinners.

Slaves to Jesus or Slaves to Sin? Read More »

I have asked God for forgiveness, do I have to ask my spouse too?

Question:If you have asked God for forgiveness do you still need to ask your spouse for forgiveness?

Marriage Guidance: Let’s take a closer look at some of the issues that are involved with repentance and seeking forgiveness so we can better understand what to do in this situation.

Seeking Christ’s Forgiveness

When we go to Christ with our sin(s) or perhaps our “sinful lifestyle” it means we have a heart-felt sorrow for what we did or for how we had been living and are “now” ready to TURN away from our sins (that lifestyle) and become a new person (transformed) in God through Jesus Christ.

I have asked God for forgiveness, do I have to ask my spouse too? Read More »

Am I an Alcoholic? (Self-test #2)

Also see: Self-test #1
The sub-questions are designed to help shed light on the basic question. Read them only if necessary, but don’t count them separately. What will eventually happen is that you will have a discussion with yourself; this is only an outline to give your conversation some constructive direction.

This survey was written by recovering people. They had the same questions while they were still drinking or using and probably came up with the same answers.

They survived and so will you. But there needs to be a starting point, and question No. 1 is as good a place as any …

Am I an Alcoholic? (Self-test #2) Read More »

Continuum of Care

Many people still think of rescue missions as places where homeless people find housing, food and spiritual instruction. Yet, those of us who are involved in this field know that unless their deeper spiritual, emotional, physical, and social needs are addressed, homeless people will never attain stability in their lives. Many suffer from mental illness, addiction to alcohol and/or drugs, and various medical problems. Some cannot read, lack high school diplomas, and do not possess basic skills needed to find and keep a job. These and other complex problems keep people on the streets.

Continuum of Care Read More »

We need boundaries! We need fences!

1 Peter 1:13-16 NRSV Therefore prepare your minds for action; discipline yourselves; set all your hope on the grace that Jesus Christ will bring you when He is revealed. Like obedient children, do not be conformed to the desires that you formerly had in ignorance. Instead, as He who called you is holy, be holy yourselves in all your conduct; for it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”

We have dogs. Currently, we have one dog, but often we have more than one. People know that we rescue poodles, and we are often called to see if we will give a poodle a home. In the past two years, the “yard” that our dogs have enjoyed has changed considerably. First, it was the portable yard that we use for our RV. We bought two units and attached them together, so it was about 6×4 feet. Not very big, but for small dogs, large enough to walk around. Last year, when we moved into the trailer, the yard was considerably larger. There was room to run and play a bit, certainly lots of room to nose around and smell (which the dogs loved to do). In this house, the yard is huge in comparison to anything we’ve had previously. It’s a big lot and the back yard goes from edge to edge. It’s possible not to be able to see our little poodle just looking out the back door; the yard is that big.

One thing every yard had in common was some kind of a fence. The fence is both a protection from at least some of the predators getting in (though there are still those, like snakes, that can get in under the fence) and a protection from the dogs getting out of the yard and being at risk of being hit by cars or stolen by thieves.

The fence is a protection.

We need boundaries! We need fences! Read More »

Is there anything wrong with “social drinking?”

Abstinence: Still the Best Choice

As a person who has struggled with addiction to alcohol and drugs, I would be foolish to drink. But what about the Christian who has never had such problems? Is there anything wrong with what is considered social drinking? I believe there are at least five compelling reasons why abstinence should be the norm for all followers of Christ:

The cost to society.
Nationwide one in four families is experiencing alcohol related problems. It is estimated that 20-25 percent of all hospital costs result directly from alcohol misuse and abuse. People without Christ drink mainly to fill a spiritual void that only Christ’s presence can fill. Therefore, Christians who do know Him ought to stand out in this fallen world by not being identified with this destructive spiritual counterfeit.

Is there anything wrong with “social drinking?” Read More »

Helping Children from Addicted & Dysfunctional Families

A. Understanding the Problems of Children from Addicted Families

In the US, twenty million children are experiencing physical, verbal and emotional abuse from parents who are addicted to alcohol and/or drugs. This is tragic when we consider that childhood is the foundation on which our entire lives are built. When a child’s efforts to bond with an addicted parent are thwarted, the result is confusion and intense anxiety. In order to survive in a home devoid of healthy parental love, limits, and consistency, they must develop “survival skills” very early in life.

In a chaotic, dysfunctional family, the lack of external control through consistent loving discipline results in an inability to develop internal discipline and self control. They learn not to depend on their parents to meet their needs – instead, it is all up to themselves. And, because they can’t trust their own parents, they become generally suspicious and mistrustful of all human beings. Yet, they are defenseless against the projection of blame and often feel responsible for parents’ addiction. They become “little adults” that feel compelled to accept responsibilities well beyond their years.

Helping Children from Addicted & Dysfunctional Families Read More »

“Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic?”

What about those who say, “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic?”

Release from compulsion is a reality
Those who react negatively to this phrase usually interpret it to mean that an addicted individual is condemned to live under the constant danger of slipping into drunkenness against his own will. This, of course, would be a definite denial of God’s power to change the addict and empower him to live a victorious life. The truth is that many believers do testify of an experience where the power of the Spirit of God actually lifted the compulsive desire to use alcohol and drugs from them. We must be mindful of the fact that, once this occurs, the newly reborn addict still must contend with all the lingering consequences of this life of bondage.

“Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic?” Read More »

Romantic Relationships in Early Recovery

Why should recovering alcoholics and addicts avoid new relationships with members of the opposite sex in the first year of recovery?

By avoiding new relationships with members of the opposite sex you also:

Avoid losing the focus on personal issues
For alcoholics and addicts, real lasting change occurs only after a long and often painful process of self discovery. This involves understanding their own addictive behaviors, repressed emotions, and destructive thought patterns. However, their denial uses the feelings and behaviors of others to avoid facing their own pain and dishonesty and from assuming responsibility for their controlling and shame-producing actions. Introducing a romantic relationship, with an intense focus on the other person, too early in recovery inevitably “short-circuits” the important process of reconnecting with self and learning to become responsible for one’s own feelings and behavior.

Romantic Relationships in Early Recovery Read More »

Michael Liimatta’s Spiritual Journey

I grew up in an alcoholic family. Both my father and my mother came from alcoholic homes, too. Because I grew up in such a very chaotic home, I was running the streets from an early age. My first drinking experience was when I was just twelve years old. I was “turned on” to pot at age fourteen, and went to jail twice for selling marijuana, hashish, and LSD, before I was eighteen years old.

In 1974, my life began to unravel. God used “the law” to get my attention. It looked like I would be “busted” for selling drugs for a third time. The fear of a long prison sentence finally brought me to the end of myself. I became so desperate that I started listening to those “Jesus freak” friends of mine. Anybody remember Jesus freaks? They were former hippies who came to know Christ. As far as I was concerned, they were really kind of spooky people who floated around and were all “smiley” and they weren’t doing any dope. Although I could not figure out what they had in their lives, I just knew I needed it, too.

Michael Liimatta’s Spiritual Journey Read More »