ANON (Those Who Love Dysfunctional People)

Traumas and Addiction (Workshop Transcript)

Obie-Host: “Welcome to our Workshop on Trauma and Addiction. We will be discussing trauma, abuse and as well as addiction. Would someone like to open us in prayer?”

“Yahweh, thank you so much for the freedom we have to gather together in fellowship with you and each other – Thank you that Yvonne is giving us her time to teach us -Holy Spirit open our eyes and ears – that we may see and hear what you would impart to us today – Have your way – may your will be done. Amen”

Obie-Host:“Welcome everyone to the Workshop on Trauma and Addiction – our leader today is Yvonne Ortega. She has credentials as long as my arm, as well as personal experiences in everything she talks about. Yvonne, please introduce yourself and tell us a bit about yourself.”

“Hi you all! Thank you for having me. It is a blessing to share with you all. Yes, I have credentials, but, I’ve also learned through the school of hard knocks.

Trauma refers to situations in which a person is rendered powerless and great danger is involved. The situations involve death and injury or the possibility of death and injury.
Those events evoke a state of extreme horror, helplessness, and fear. They are events of such intensity and magnitude they would overtax any human being’s ability to cope.

Such events can be childhood physical abuse or sexual abuse, domestic violence, sexual assault and rape, natural catastrophes such as hurricanes and tornadoes, car accidents, war and combat, and a life-threatening disease. Just as the body can be traumatized, so can the psyche.

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Life is Messy, Sloppy, Sometimes Miserable

Isaiah 43:10-13
“But you are my witnesses, O Israel!” says the Lord. “And you are my servant. You have been chosen to know me, believe in me, and understand that I alone am God. There is no other God; there never has been and never will be. I am the Lord, and there is no other Savior. First I predicted your deliverance; I declared what I would do, and then I did it — I saved you. No foreign god has ever done this before. You are witnesses that I am the only God,” says the Lord. “From eternity to eternity I am God. No one can oppose what I do. No one can reverse my actions” (NLT).

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Enabling – the Wrong Kind of Help

Many are godly people who have prayed for their loved ones, yet they watch painfully as they continue down a path of rebellion and destruction. So what can you do to help you loved ones? Stop enabling!

Enabling – Offering the Wrong Kind of Help.
Enabling is rescuing your loved ones so that they do not experience the painful consequences of their irresponsible decisions. Enabling is anything that stands in the way of persons experiencing the natural consequences of their own behavior.

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PSTD: Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

** Have you, or someone you love Been through combat?
** Lived through a disaster?
** Been raped?
** Experienced any other kind of traumatic event?

Have you ever thought that painful memories of that experience were still causing problems for you or a loved one?

You may have heard of PTSD—posttraumatic stress disorder—on the news or from friends and family, and wondered what it is, or whether you or someone you know has it. This booklet will help you understand what PTSD is.

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Married to an Abusive Alcoholic: Am I Helping My Spouse to Drink?

It can be very difficult when living with an alcoholic. You never know what to expect from one moment to the next. If you are married to an alcoholic then you need to set boundaries for your personal self. You NEED to take care of you now. You do not have to allow the alcoholics verbal abuses to take control of your emotions another minute longer!

We’ve all heard the saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me”. Well, this is pretty much what it’s like when living with a verbally abusive alcoholic. Learn to not let “the names” hurt you by emotionally detaching. You should never allow the alcoholic behavior control how you will behave because by doing this it shows that you are controlled by alcoholism just as much as the alcoholic is.

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Prayer for the Heavy Hearted

Abba…I sense many heavy hearts today. Hearts that are burdened and weighed down by what they are seeing and experiencing.

For some, it seems as if the world is closing in on them and coming against them at every turn. Nothing they are trying to do turns out well and some are even wondering in their hearts where You are in all of this. They are battling discouragement as they walk in the way they believe You have sent them. They are trying to minister to others with seemingly no to little success. They are being faithful, yet wondering if You might actually have abandoned them. They so need Your reassurance and a sense of Your Presence.

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How to Not Change Your Spouse

Loving our spouse is giving them the freedom to be who it is they are. When we love without WANTING anything in return, that is when we have accepted our spouse for being who they are, faults and all.

This of course, doesn’t include iniquitous behavior because if anyone is carrying on and regularly doing things in err against spouse or God, they certainly are not being the person they were meant to be. Therefore, this article does not apply to them.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change!

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When You Have No Sponsor or Recovery Buddy

It is OK Not to Have a Sponsor
Not everyone in recovery has a mentor all of the time. It is OK not to have a sponsor or recovery buddy! It is important for you to have a special rapport with the person who is going to be your recovery buddy or sponsor. Do not try to rush the process The more time you spend finding an appropriate person the more likely you will find someone who is a good listener and communicator. Not everyone is able or willing to commit to being a good sponsor. They may have other obligations that prevent them from being an effective mentor.

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Learning Not To Take Offense

According to John Bevere in his book,The Bait of Satan, the bait of taking offense is the number one trap that the enemy – Satan – sets for Christians. And the closer the relationship between the people involved in the offense taken, the deeper the wound and the deeper the offense, as seen in the depth of David’s suffering when he expresses his suffering after being betrayed by one near and dear to him in Psalm 55:

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What it Means to Detach From the Alcoholic

Ask Angie: What can I do as a Christian woman to stop my husband from drinking too much beer? He doesn’t think it’s a big deal because he is not drunk and because in his eyes he is a good man.

Ask Angie:What about love? I get the detachment thing, but will the love I still have in me disappear too? That is a fear.

**This marriage column has three marriage videos that go along with it. Listening to these videos will help you get a better understanding about what detachment from addiction really means for you and for the alcoholic. These videos talk in more detail about how to detach with love and to let go…<.em>

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