Bible Studies

The Parent-Child Relationship

Ultimately we are left with family. In fact, that may be why so many people get divorced or break up relationships. They are looking for the kind of stability that one should find within a family. Perhaps the idea of a soul mate even comes from this longing, the longing to have a place called “home” within which there is love and safety and comfort.

A stupid child is ruin to a father,
and a wife’s quarreling is a continual dripping of rain. Proverbs 19:13

This proverb isn’t about children who lack intelligence, but rather about children who are foolish and silly. Matthew Henry writes:

“A son that will apply himself to no study or business, that will take no advice, that lives a lewd, loose, rakish life, and spends what he has extravagantly, games it away and wastes it in the excess of riot, or that is proud, foppish, and conceited, such a one is the grief of his father, because he is the disgrace, and is likely to be the ruin, of his family.”

Proverbs 23:24-25 states that

The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who begets a wise son will be glad in him. Let your father and mother be glad; let her who bore you rejoice.

There is a reciprocity within the parent-child relationship. Parents are to raise their children to be righteous; children are to choose the path of righteousness. When these children turn their backs on the Lord, it is a great sorrow to the parents. Wise children follow the Lord and His will. Foolish children stand up in arrogance and turn their backs on everything their parents believe and taught.

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“Fat” or “Beautiful” ?

I recently caught a documentary on sex symbol Bettie Page. In it, the withdrawn, elderly phenomenon recounted her entire life, including her racy photographs and films which catered to bondage, nudity and fetish culture.

According to Ms. Page’s commentary, she initially tried the conventional methods first. However, the well- known Ford modeling agency rejected her. Founder Eileen Ford, herself, flat out told Bette she was too short and “too hippy.”

So, Bettie turned to the more controversial avenue, which subsequently launched her into being the pop culture icon she is today.

And, due to her influence, there are numerous photos flooding the internet, with captions including, “Today, we’d call her fat.”

It’s makes for a strong body image message. Indeed, looking at her image, what is our response? Do we think she’s fat?

Likewise, there’s the legendary sex symbol, Marilyn Monroe. She was reportedly a size 12 or 14. Some even speculate she was a size 16!

Again, when we see her, when we are faced with her numbers, what’s our first reaction?

She’s beautiful?

“Fat” or “Beautiful” ? Read More »

Distortion: What is the Size of the Scale?

Distortion. It’s a major factor which drives disorder, compulsion and addiction.

And, for those of us recovering from disordered eating and negative body image issues, a crucial centerpiece of our distortion is the scale.
We are ruled by it. We step on it daily, sometimes even several times a day. I know I did, at my worst. We feel defeat or victory, depends upon what the numbers say.

And likewise, in response to this scale obsession, we’ve also heard many a platitude about how “Your weight is not your worth” and “You’re more than a number.”

It is easier heard than believed or lived.

Nevertheless, our thoughts determine the quality of our lives.

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he… Proverbs 23:7

Put simply, it’s how you and I see things. And for most of us who struggle, the scale has loomed too large in our lives. We have completely lost perspective. We determine everything solely by what it says.

Recently, I acquired a dollhouse miniature scale; it’s about an inch big. And looking at it, I see how insignificant it truly is. I can hold it on my index finger. But it has no power to decide my worth, my success or destiny. I could flick it into oblivion with my finger if I so choose.

Distortion: What is the Size of the Scale? Read More »

What does “Pray Without Ceasing” Mean?

Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 declares that God’s will for us is that we

[p]ray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks.

To pray unceasingly does not mean spending twenty-four hours daily in prayer. >b>Rather, it means being open continually to God, sharing our thoughts and hopes with Him in mental prayer, and so on. It means, as we face a problem, praying, in a sentence, “Lord, help me with this problem”; or, “Give me patience as I talk with this trying person”; or, “Thank you for seeing me through that mess,” and similar prayers.

O. Hallesby years ago wrote, “We cannot breathe in the early morning in such a way that it will be sufficient until noon. Likewise, we cannot pray in the morning so as to suffice until noon.”

Continual sentence prayers are simply Christian breathing. They keep us alive and strong.

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Do You Truly Love Yourself?

There has been much discussion in the past decades about people needing to love themselves. It is an unnecessary discussion. We do love ourselves. It is part of the flesh nature. We may not love the situation we’re in, but the fact is that we wouldn’t even have the conversation if we didn’t, by our very nature, love ourselves.


To get wisdom is to love oneself;
to keep understanding is to prosper. Proverbs 19:8 NRSV

Satan, who is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:44), tries to convince us that we need to spend more time focusing on loving ourselves. We need to focus on ourselves, to spend our time and resources getting for ourselves. We need to defend ourselves and get all that we deserve… for ourselves.

Rubbish!

Proverbs tells us that, if we truly love ourselves, we will first look to getting wisdom. That having wisdom is how we will prosper. And what is wisdom? Wisdom is God Himself.

In other words, if we truly love ourselves, we will do exactly the opposite of what feels comfortable. We will sacrifice, turn our backs on our own needs, and throw ourselves on the love and protection of our Heavenly Father Who is infinitely better suited to take care of us than we ourselves.

Do You Truly Love Yourself? Read More »

Using Money to Gain “Friends” & Control Your Life

We are deluged with pictures of parties, frivolity, and laughter… in commercials and advertisements. Everyone seems so happy! And all because they bought ___________ (fill in the blank). In other words, they had money. And because of the money, they had friends.

Wealth brings many friends,
but the poor are left friendless. Proverbs19:4 NRSV

Proverbs confirms it. Money brings friends. But what kind of friends? More importantly, what will happen to those friends when the money disappears?

Some friends play at friendship but a true friend sticks closer than one’s nearest kin. Proverbs 18:24 NRSV

A person who is my friend because I have the money to entertain them or to give them isn’t really my friend.
A friend loves at all times. Proverbs 17:17 NRSV

If someone is truly my friend, she will be there even during the hard times.

But this proverb is more than just about friends. It’s about money and how we desire it in order to change and control our lives. We think that with money life will be easier; things will be better. We might even be more popular. The Lord Jesus talked about money:

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The Sea in the Ship is All Wrong

Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good, acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2


There’s an old saying: “The ship in the sea is alright. The sea in the ship is all wrong. The Church in the world is alright. The world in the church is all wrong.”

Everything you and I believe as Christians flies in the face of our post-modern culture. We believe in a God who has made His existence known to everyone (Romans 1:18-22) despite the strong denials of man. We believe in a God who has communicated to us in clear terms in a book called the Bible (2 Tim. 3:16, 17). We believe in absolutes, for we believe in a God who is Truth Himself, and who tells us what is right and what is wrong. We believe in the one true Gospel of Jesus Christ (Rom. 1:16, 17) who said, “I am the way, the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father but by Me.” John 14:6. We believe that the Lord Jesus Christ is the way to God and the only way to God, and we deny that He is merely a way, a truth and a life, and one of the ways to God. Understand that we do not say this because we believe our opinion is greater than someone else’s, but because Christ Himself said this about Himself, and we believe His claims are valid, trustworthy and true… We believe too that if Christ is not THE way to God, then He is a liar, and not even one of the ways to God. Jesus Christ is either who He claimed to be, or else He is a fraud, or perhaps a lunatic. But what He could never be is merely one of the ways to God. If we take His words with any seriousness at all, then we have to admit that His own claims deny this very possibility.

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Are You Cultivating Seeds or Weeds?

How do you get vegetables out of your garden? By planting vegetables, of course. This is a fact almost too obvious to mention, except for the fact that most people seem to have forgotten that you reap what you sow and you harvest what you plant,

for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. (Galatians 6:7)


Now if a man simply kept weeding a garden patch without ever planting it to vegetables, we would certainly have a right to call him at least a fool if he expected weeding to give him vegetables. We should, in fact, question his sanity.

But this foolishness is exactly what millions of “good Americans” are dedicated to: they do nothing but pull up weeds, and they expect to harvest vegetables. How? They are always fighting the weeds which crop up in the life of America, in the churches, schools, and organizations, and this is all that millions of them do-pull weeds.

Meanwhile, the country and everything in it goes downhill.

Make no mistake about it, the weeds of communism, atheism, and permissiveness must be uprooted, but what good will all this weeding do if no sound seeds are sown? The net result is simply a better patch for new weeds to sprout in. Jesus said of the man who rid himself of an unclean spirit without submitting himself to God and bearing fruit to God that such a man becomes then a dwelling place for eight unclean spirits, “and the last state of that man is worse than the first.

“Even so shall it be also unto this wicked generation.” (Matthew 12:45) When people are simply interested in getting rid of their weeds, their problems, and have no desire for planting seeds, for moral and spiritual regeneration, then they are only the worse off for their efforts.

Are You Cultivating Seeds or Weeds? Read More »

Are You Living Below Your Privileges in Christ?

The story is told of a man in England whose lifetime ambition was to take a trip to the United States of America. One day, a friend of his surprised him with the gift of an envelope. In opening it, the man discovered a ticket for a boat trip from the English port of Southampton (where he lived) to New York City. Overjoyed, and overwhelmed by the generosity of his friend, the man realized his dream was soon to come true.

On boarding the ship, the man’s joy could be seen by all. Yet one thing differentiated him from the others on board. During meal times, the rest of the passengers went into the dinner lounge to enjoy sumptuous gourmet meals. Instead, this man went back to his cabin and opened the little bag he carried with him on board containing crackers and cheese, and day by day, he consumed the contents, alone.

Undeterred, the man, if it was possible, was only growing in excitement. He knew that in a short time, he would see America for the first time. In fact, he understood that there would be relatives waiting to meet him at New York harbor. The long sea crossing from England seemed a short one to him, because of the wonders he knew were awaiting him at the journey’s end.

Are You Living Below Your Privileges in Christ? Read More »

Self-Image: Belief and the Media

It’s difficult to live in this culture and not hit negative body image. It’s particularly potent for those of us struggling with disordered eating and image issues. Check out the statistics:

  • Numerous correlational and experimental studies have linked exposure to the thin ideal in mass media to body dissatisfaction, internalization of the thin ideal, and disordered eating among women.
  • The effect of media on women’s body dissatisfaction, thin ideal internalization, and disordered eating appears to be stronger among young adults than children and adolescents. This may suggest that long-term exposure during childhood and adolescence lays the foundation for the negative effects of media during early adulthood.
  • Pressure from mass media to be muscular also appears to be related to body dissatisfaction among men. This effect may be smaller than among women but it is still significant.
  • Young men seem to be more negatively affected by the media images than adolescent boys are.

    • (Media, Body Image, and Eating Disorders:
    http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/media-body-image-and-eating-disorders)

    We cannot underestimate the influence of media. George Orwell warned us of that sentiment years earlier:
    “The people believe what the media tells them they believe.”

    Self-Image: Belief and the Media Read More »