Sex

I am Freed from Being a Lesbian

Some of you, my friends, have asked me, “How did God or what circumstances did He use to free me from being a bi-sexual/lesbian?”

When I first came on the Internet, I didn’t really tell anyone right away about my problem of being a lesbian. All my life I had wanted to change this part of me. I couldn’t stand being a lesbian, with all those perverted thoughts and images and (yes doing the act with a woman) going on in my head. I knew there had to be a way to be free from it, but didn’t know how to be set free. I couldn’t talk about it to anyone for fear of being rejected, unloved, and even neglected especially by GOD.

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I Always had Those “Feelings” When Growing Up

I grew up in a very small town of about 600 people. My parents are saved and we always had all kinds of missionaries, special speakers from around come and stay with us. Our home was never quiet 🙂 From a very age I heard the Word of GOD preached and we always went to church every time the doors would open. At age 4 I thought that is how I would get into heaven by going to church, being a “good girl” and by doing works. I never really believed or accepted Christ as Savior until much later. Everybody in my hometown knew everybody’s else’s business.

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I have been keeping a secret since I was 7, I’m 36 now…

I have been keeping a secret since I was 7, I’m 36 now. No one knows about this secret, except for the one person who was hosting the Same Sex Attraction (SSA) Meeting last night.

I feel as though the Holy Spirit came and held me and then whispered in my ears (and fingers) to share…to go ahead and get it off my quiet little mind.

I feel as though I experienced a miracle here at Christians in Recovery so that is why I want to share this with you… I think if I experienced a miracle in my life that I’m to share it with everyone here at cir…. because God has given me Christians in Recovery (CIR) in my life to help me grow and heal. It’s been a journey these past 3-4 years here.

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I was Drowning

To tell what CIR has meant to me is to tell a story of survival – a life saved – spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

I do not consider it a mere coincidence or stroke of luck as to how I came to find Christians in Recovery. I have no doubts whatsoever that God led me directly to this wonderful place. I was literally losing my life, drowning in a sea of addictions, SSA, depression, and drugs… all the effects of past sexual abuse.

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My Dance with the Bottle

Hi, my name is Rob.

I was born in Grand Rapids, Michigan. I lived all my school years here and then went into the Army when I was 19. I gave my life to Christ when I was 14. Then began a long uphill battle. I was extremely shy in school and was always trying to find a place to fit in. I experimented with drugs, but they scared me too much. Then came alcohol. I went to a party when I was in the 12th grade. They had beer, I drank, I got drunk, I got sick…. I cooled it for awhile after that, and tried to stay on the straight and narrow with God. I got baptized and became a member of a church. I was happy with Jesus in my heart.

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Living a Double Standard

My feelings of guilt and shame towards a same-sex attraction began at an early age. I experienced frequent sexual abuse from an older male friend during most of my teen years, and hustling for money soon followed.

Years later, I was baptized in a Mennonite Brethren church as a public declaration that I would follow Christ. My secret desire was that maybe now my attraction and sexual fantasies towards men would disappear. They didn’t, and the fantasies soon turned into years of acting out behaviours.

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Christian Guidance and Counseling

CLICK HERE IF YOU ARE IN CRISIS Database of Christian Recovery Ministries, Groups, Counselors and Meetings Biblical Counseling Referrals for Christian counselors: Christian Counseling Associations can recommend counselors. The following ministries provide guidance: Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, Guidance Dept. Toll Free Phone: 877-247-2426 Focus on the Family Toll Free Phone: 800-232-6459) American Family Radio Christian

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Do I Need a Sponsor?

Sponsors are not mandatory components of recovery programs, but I do recommend the acquisition of a sponsor during the first few months of your recovery.

When I finally became disgusted with my feeble attempts at recovery on my own, I decided to get a sponsor. I didn’t just go up to the first male member and ask him to be my sponsor. I had to ask several members if they were available for sponsorship. Sometimes, if you are a newcomer, a member will volunteer to be your sponsor if you ask if they are available. But be prepared to ask more than two or three people to be your sponsor. You may even have to change your meeting location to find a sponsor, especially if your home group is small.

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Take Your Time and Easy Does It

All to often, people fail in their recovery attempts only because they were in a hurry. Even in recovery…things take time.

For alcoholics and addicts, it is especially true that difficulties play an enormous part in our lives. They call forth our power, our strength, and our energies as nothing can. But when clean and sober, sometimes they strengthen character.

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God’s Love

Part 1 Breaking Habits | Part 2 Tapping into the Unknown | Part 3 Breaking Habits and Sin | Part 4 God’s Love | Part 5 Scary Secrets | Part 6 Are You Ready?

Knowing God’s Love Need Not Be Difficult
I can easily believe that the atom-holding, earth-spinning, galaxy-sustaining, life-giving Source of everything wonderful can do whatever He likes. Even the devil believes God’s power. My difficulty is believing that God’s special love for me makes Him long to use that power on my behalf. Who am I that I should deserve this kind of treatment, especially after doing the “raunchy” things that I do.

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