Ask Angie: If I as a person am #1 who can I help? Love is not self-seeking. If I seek to help myself first who matters after me? If I choose to help others first am I not full filled? Love is the greatest commandment. So why can’t we love?
Ask Angie: Dear Angie, I have been married to an alcoholic husband for eight years now and we have two young children together. We have taken marriage courses and I have been reading the Love Dare. I have tried the detach method but it is difficult since he starts drinking every day at around 9 or 10 in the morning (since he was laid off over six months ago) and drinks until he goes to bed which is usually midnight. If I don’t talk to him when he’s drinking he gets angry. How can I make the detachment work in this situation and how can I protect our children from his anger?
Stop Rescuing the Alcoholic and Start Rescuing You Read More »
…get me in a lot of trouble.
I got disappointed this week.
Disclaimer: I’m only telling this story because I think it contains some valuable lessons. The details don’t matter—this is about my personal failure, nothing else.
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A couple of years ago I was invited to be a very small part of a project. No contracts or financial commitments, just a small once-per-week contribution. Four other people, all much more qualified and credible, also joined. I felt pleased and honored to be included.
Unspoken Expectations Read More »
Ask Angie: I forgave husband of infidelity and adultery now he won’t talk to me nor sleep close to me what am I doing wrong?
Marriage Guidance: How can forgiveness be wrong? Forgiving others their trespasses against us is always the right thing to do, even if they continue trespassing against us. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”. All you can do is your part in the marriage and it looks like you are attempting to do that by forgiving your husband. You didn’t tell me if he has repented of adultery or not so I can only speculate that he has not.
Let’s talk about ways in which we can heal ourselves and restore marriage after adultery.
Make God First in Marriage
I Have Forgiven My Husband’s Adultery but He is Distant Read More »
Family relationships can be very challenging at times. It is important to approach difficulties prayerfully. The Christians in Recovery Web site is loaded with hundreds of pages of information and files designed to help you learn and to equip you.
You are not alone! God can and will help you overcome your situation.
Family Info & Help Read More »
If you really want to save your marriage, you must start with a clean slate. That means to get rid of the worldly attitudes and practices that have polluted your marriage and follow God’s plan for your marriage instead. We’re so used to treating our marriage like everyone else does, or the way we were taught, or from what we think is the right way to handle it, but look where all that has gotten many of our marriages of today.
Save Your Marriage By Starting With a Clean Slate Read More »
Do you want your marriage nursed back to health? If you want your marriage restored it will take some effort on your part. Stop peering over the fence at your neighbor, and put your eyes back in your own yard where they belong.
First, the offended spouse needs to forgive completely (see my article, forgive a cheating spouse), and secondly the offender has to understand why he strayed from the marriage bed in the first place. Infidelity is only a symptom of a greater problem within the framework of the marriage.
If you have been unfaithful or have anything else pulling you away from your spouse, ask yourself why? What am I doing that would cause me to be disloyal? Don’t blame your spouse for your weakness. Grow up and take responsibility.
Heal Marriage After Adultery Read More »
To detach with love from the alcoholic means to not allow what they do while drinking harm your emotional and or spiritual well being.
Detaching with love is something learned that over time becomes a habit-a good habit actually.
To understand how detaching with love works, we must first understand what not detaching is, and what it does to us, as well as the alcoholic you live with. When we don’t detach we get angry, resentful, and sometimes fearful over the behaviors of the alcoholic. This happens because we are “too” consumed with the behaviors of the alcoholic or better known as the symptoms of the drinking.
Detach with Love from the Alcoholic Read More »
Stop everything you’re doing and write down these principled ways for reconnecting and restoring the broken bonds with your spouse. Apply each of these principles every day until you have completed them all. Don’t worry about what your spouse will say or do, just do these steps for yourself and for God.
Forgive Your Spouse
Restoring Marriage When Only One Spouse Is Willing Read More »
