Faith

Abused? God has victory for You!

There are many of us out there who have been bullied and abused.

Whether we’ve been beaten verbally, emotionally, physically and sexually by a family member, have been teased, thrown in lockers or picked last for teams as kids or, worst case scenario – all of the above – it certainly is a challenge to live through that, let alone, overcome it.

Many of us are underdogs, the forgotten, the least likely.

And that is precisely why one of the things that I love most about God is His viewpoint on that status. God’s “M.O.” is one of championing the underdog, encouraging him/her, and exalting/promoting that individual, not just in spite of the odds, but quite often, because of them.

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Discipline Or Regret: Which Pain Do We Embrace?

I don’t know who said it, but there is a quote which goes something like:

“You either embrace the pain of discipline or you embrace the pain of regret.”


Yes, I know, it’s a festive one.

Nevertheless, it is a reality check, especially for those of us in recovery from any particular thing which has seized our pleasure centers, all in an effort to escape pain. We desire pleasure to soothe, numb or obliterate our pain. We believe the lie it will happen. Furthermore, we also believe there can be no good thing which comes from denying our indulgences for it.

Therefore, as we stumble and relapse, we often choose to embrace the pain of regret concerning our addictions and the harmful consequences which can follow.

It’s not to shame anyone. Rather, it’s, again, to provide the reality check that none of us are immune from relapse and bad decisions. We are all vulnerable.

For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust. Psalms 103:14

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; Romans 3:23

It’s acknowledged in the first two Twelve Steps:

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Peer Pressure & Sin

In Haggai 2:12-19, God drives home a very telling point to the prophet. If we place an unclean thing together with a clean one, the cleanness of the latter will not rub off onto the former. If I rub my dirty and ink-stained hands on a clean towel, the cleanness of the towel will not rub off onto my hands: rather it is dirt that is transferred, and the towel becomes dirty.

By this means the Lord made clear to Haggai and Judah that sin is contagious, but righteousness is not. We are not Christians simply because we belong to a good church, a good family, or a fine community. Moreover, a good profession of faith does not make us holy or godly.

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Unbreakable Grace

For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace. Romans 6:14


For years, I’ve had a small Jesus statue, depicting thanksgiving to God for the loaves and fishes. This statue has traveled from Portland, Oregon to Dallas, Texas to our current locale of Minnesota. And, over the years and states, it has, unfortunately been broken at least a couple of times. His small hand, holding a broken loaf of bread, has repeatedly been glued back on.

It’s irritating, yet also meditative, as it got me thinking about the whole grace thing.

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Memories: Ouch!

Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation;
and uphold me with thy free spirit.
Psalm 51:12


Autumn floods me with childhood memories of locusts inhabiting our farm and caterpillars on twigs, kept on mason jars, just waiting to become monarch butterflies.

And, with that flooding, often comes the tinged bittersweet feelings that accompany a childhood innocence of long ago.

I recently caught a funny post on the internet. It read: “Memories: Ouch!”

They say humor is humor because it is unflinching truth. And that certainly was the case with this post.

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Our Reward-Driven Selves

I recently saw one of those cute dog posts on the internet, saying the following:
“So, you’re telling me you have a whole box of treats but I only get one?”

After I stopped giggling, I squirmed a bit. For who was I to laugh at this dog? I have often dealt with that particular thought myself.

And it’s further complicated by the reality I am reward-oriented.

As I’ve tried, over the course of my childhood, adolescence and adult years to constructively deal with that fact, let’s face it, all too often, the bright shiny rewards are just too tempting.

But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. James 1:14-15

Most of the time, like our little canine friend here, I’ve looked to consume an entire box or bag of something instead of eating one cracker, chip or cookie. Indeed, my attitude…

“So, you’re telling me you have a whole box of treats but I only get one?”

And, more times than I care to count, I’ve looked to other things, instead of God, to satisfy me and be my substitute. And yes, that’s even while being a Christian.

I know- shocking!

But, before you hyperventilate, please keep in mind, you, my friend, are mortal also.

For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust. Psalms 103:14

Rewards on the brain.. are you guilty of this? C’mon, be honest.

And yes, unfortunately, for many of us challenged by addictions, compulsions and disorders, these elusive things are far too desirable to ignore. Ideally, we would focus on our true, meaningful rewards, as connected to our loving God.

After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, “Fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward.” Genesis 15:1

Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. Colossians 3:24

Ideally, we would concentrate on this, appreciating, thanking Him for it, being satisfied and peaceful about the entire thing. But hey, c’mon, we’re dusty, remember?

So, this is more like it…

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What is Forgiveness of Sin?

What is forgiveness of sin?

1) To forgive sin, is to take away iniquity.
“Why dost thou not take away mine iniquity?” Job 7:21.
It is a metaphor taken from a man that carries a heavy burden which is ready to sink him, and another comes, and lifts it off, so when the heavy burden of sin is on us, God in pardoning, lifts it off from the conscience, and lays it upon Christ.
He has laid on him the iniquity of us all. Isaiah 53:6.

2) To forgive sin, is to cover it.
Thou hast covered all their sin. Psalm 85:2.
This was typified by the mercy-seat covering the ark, to show God’s covering of sin through Christ. God does not cover sin in the Antinomian sense, so as he sees it not, but he so covers it, that he will not impute it.

3) To forgive sin, is to blot it out.
“I am he that blotteth out thy transgressions.” Isaiah 43:25.
The Hebrew word, to blot out, alludes to a creditor who, when his debtor has paid him, blots out the debt, and gives him an acquittance; so when God forgives sin, he blots out the debt, he draws the red lines of Christ’s blood over it, and so crosses the debt-book.

4) To forgive sin is for God to scatter our sins as a cloud.
“I have blotted out as a thick cloud thy transgressions.” Isaiah 44:22.
Sin is the cloud, an interposing cloud, which disperses, that the light of his countenance may break forth.

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The Thinspo Slave Market

Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage. Galatians 5:1


The artist Jean-Leon Gérôme’s 1884 work, “A Roman Slave Market” is a startling example of image on display. It portrays a naked woman, up for sale to an enthusiastic crowd. It made me think of how image, especially female image, is offered up so easily and cheaply in our culture today. Some of its most extreme manifestations, unfortunately, extend to disordered eating and body image issues.

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How is Your Spiritual Heart Health?

God has been teaching me His way concerning heart health. The condition of my physical heart mirrored the state of my spiritual heart. Through a physical and spiritual heart catheterization He exposed blockages, which left untreated, would be my certain physical and spiritual demise. He exposed areas of my heart that were still wounded and thus divided. I suspect I am not alone in this process.

According to the parable of the sower, Jesus teaches that It is from our hearts that we gain all spiritual guidance and understanding.

“But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop” Luke 8:15 NIV.

“All valid spiritual direction comes to us through our heart-the seat of true knowing and our “eyes and ears” in the spirit. If we discern the “will of God” it is through our heart. Knowing our true identity and destiny is achieved through our hearts as well.” “Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You”, pg.67, published by Shepherd’s House, Inc. revised version 2000.

As a direct result of these remaining heart blockages, I was no longer able to fully hear, retain, or re-produce a good crop from the word that had been so wonderfully planted in my heart for decades. The ability to correctly discern, know and understand Papa’s will or my true identity and destiny as Papa’s beloved son were being robbed from me. In this state, my capacity for joy was weakened. Of course my loved ones were profoundly affected by my heart disease as well (which of course there has been profound mercy and the amazing grace of forgiveness).

When your heart has blockages, your core identity becomes at best skewed and can even lose touch with reality. You are less able to live from the new heart Jesus gave you as your birthright. You even can end up not behaving or acting like who you truly are-an adopted child of God. Probably the most devastating part of this condition is being blocked from enjoying Christ in your heart. He-of course, will never leave us or forsake us-but our intimacy with Him can be diminished.

I am being so transparent about this in hopes to impart the courage for you to ask Papa to search your heart and know truth in your inner most parts, as King David did. This is why he was “called a man after God’s own heart.”

The single goal of heart healing is to

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What Measures You?

I once came across an image of two little girls looking down at a bathroom scale. This was the caption:
“Don’t step on it. It makes you cry.”

Troubling.

Indeed, as a child, I had my own painful association it. There was once a time when I only saw a weird square in our bathroom. I didn’t give it much attention; I was more interested in the blue windmill stencil designs lining the tub and my rubber ducky. It was just a square, taking up space.

However, suddenly, Mom placed me on this square – and I became conscious of what I weighed. Apparently, it wasn’t a good digit as, with more frequency, I needed to get on this square. Now, suddenly, I had a “weight problem.”

And ever since, I no longer see just a square.

Throughout my childhood and adolescence, it dictated my worth, which was never good enough, always too big and always too heavy.

That drove me to eating disorders, with the hope as I became more punishing of myself, more “dedicated,” well, then my two-digit weight as a young adult would mean triumph. It, however, never really did become that reality, of course. Because, I could always lose more weight and somehow, magically, “be better.”

On and on and on I went, into my own hell…

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