Overcome

“Fat” or “Beautiful” ?

I recently caught a documentary on sex symbol Bettie Page. In it, the withdrawn, elderly phenomenon recounted her entire life, including her racy photographs and films which catered to bondage, nudity and fetish culture.

According to Ms. Page’s commentary, she initially tried the conventional methods first. However, the well- known Ford modeling agency rejected her. Founder Eileen Ford, herself, flat out told Bette she was too short and “too hippy.”

So, Bettie turned to the more controversial avenue, which subsequently launched her into being the pop culture icon she is today.

And, due to her influence, there are numerous photos flooding the internet, with captions including, “Today, we’d call her fat.”

It’s makes for a strong body image message. Indeed, looking at her image, what is our response? Do we think she’s fat?

Likewise, there’s the legendary sex symbol, Marilyn Monroe. She was reportedly a size 12 or 14. Some even speculate she was a size 16!

Again, when we see her, when we are faced with her numbers, what’s our first reaction?

She’s beautiful?

“Fat” or “Beautiful” ? Read More »

Distortion: What is the Size of the Scale?

Distortion. It’s a major factor which drives disorder, compulsion and addiction.

And, for those of us recovering from disordered eating and negative body image issues, a crucial centerpiece of our distortion is the scale.
We are ruled by it. We step on it daily, sometimes even several times a day. I know I did, at my worst. We feel defeat or victory, depends upon what the numbers say.

And likewise, in response to this scale obsession, we’ve also heard many a platitude about how “Your weight is not your worth” and “You’re more than a number.”

It is easier heard than believed or lived.

Nevertheless, our thoughts determine the quality of our lives.

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he… Proverbs 23:7

Put simply, it’s how you and I see things. And for most of us who struggle, the scale has loomed too large in our lives. We have completely lost perspective. We determine everything solely by what it says.

Recently, I acquired a dollhouse miniature scale; it’s about an inch big. And looking at it, I see how insignificant it truly is. I can hold it on my index finger. But it has no power to decide my worth, my success or destiny. I could flick it into oblivion with my finger if I so choose.

Distortion: What is the Size of the Scale? Read More »

What does “Pray Without Ceasing” Mean?

Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 declares that God’s will for us is that we

[p]ray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks.

To pray unceasingly does not mean spending twenty-four hours daily in prayer. >b>Rather, it means being open continually to God, sharing our thoughts and hopes with Him in mental prayer, and so on. It means, as we face a problem, praying, in a sentence, “Lord, help me with this problem”; or, “Give me patience as I talk with this trying person”; or, “Thank you for seeing me through that mess,” and similar prayers.

O. Hallesby years ago wrote, “We cannot breathe in the early morning in such a way that it will be sufficient until noon. Likewise, we cannot pray in the morning so as to suffice until noon.”

Continual sentence prayers are simply Christian breathing. They keep us alive and strong.

What does “Pray Without Ceasing” Mean? Read More »

Self-Image: Belief and the Media

It’s difficult to live in this culture and not hit negative body image. It’s particularly potent for those of us struggling with disordered eating and image issues. Check out the statistics:

  • Numerous correlational and experimental studies have linked exposure to the thin ideal in mass media to body dissatisfaction, internalization of the thin ideal, and disordered eating among women.
  • The effect of media on women’s body dissatisfaction, thin ideal internalization, and disordered eating appears to be stronger among young adults than children and adolescents. This may suggest that long-term exposure during childhood and adolescence lays the foundation for the negative effects of media during early adulthood.
  • Pressure from mass media to be muscular also appears to be related to body dissatisfaction among men. This effect may be smaller than among women but it is still significant.
  • Young men seem to be more negatively affected by the media images than adolescent boys are.

    • (Media, Body Image, and Eating Disorders:
    http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/media-body-image-and-eating-disorders)

    We cannot underestimate the influence of media. George Orwell warned us of that sentiment years earlier:
    “The people believe what the media tells them they believe.”

    Self-Image: Belief and the Media Read More »

    When the Past Haunts Us

    I often find myself going over and over the past,like when I am trying to go to sleep at night and can’t because of these thoughts. All the fear and panic of the past creeps into my present. It is as if I re-live it all in real time. It can be extremely painful both spiritually and emotionally.

    I have come to learn a few things.

    1. I can always learn from my past and I think we are supposed to learn from our past mistakes and missteps.

    2. Satan can use the past to keep me in bondage. And that is certainly not the will of God. The last thing I want is to be doing what Satan wants. So, when these thoughts come back to me I pray. I ask God for healing in this area of my life.

    When the past comes back to haunt me it can be something from years ago or from just yesterday. Usually the result is confusion in my entire being. But scripture teaches:

    For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace. 1 Corinthians 14:33

    So I have to wonder if it is not Satan who drags some of this stuff up to confuse me, to make all of these emotions boil over and create a mess. Now, I am not saying I have to ignore these feelings and emotions. They should and must be dealt with in a godly and biblical fashion. But I cannot allow them to create confusion and a mess in my life. I have to be aware of these emotions and deal with them, not allow the pot to boil over.

    When the Past Haunts Us Read More »

    Is it Possible to Actually Seek Rejection?

    “Actors search for rejection. If they don’t get it, they reject themselves.”
    ~Charlie Chaplin


    As someone with a theater background, I’ve often encountered rejection.

    I’ve endured many auditions and have heard my fair share of no. I didn’t look the part, sound the part, I couldn’t get a handle on a certain accent or I simply was not “good enough.”

    Ah, yes, “good enough.” For many of us perfectionists and/or recovering addicts, this little phrase cuts right to the core.

    In one way or another, we are recovering from something in life. And yes, it’s often fueled by rejection.

    Is it Possible to Actually Seek Rejection? Read More »

    What are you willing to change?

    We’re in the middle of cold and flu season; sickness abounds.

    And, it’s at this time of year, I think about healing. It’s one thing to be flu-ridden, queasy, achy, possessing a high fever and wish to be well.

    However, it’s another thing if we struggle with addictions and compulsions; they are also referred to as “disease.” With that situation, we’re often conflicted at best and resistant and unhealthy at worst. What is our response to the question, “Do you want to get well?”

    Hey, even Jesus asked the question.

    What are you willing to change? Read More »

    The Most and The Greatest

    The most useless thing to do ………..Worry
    The greatest Joy………………………….Giving
    The greatest loss……………..Loss of self-respect
    The most satisfying work…………….Helping others

    The ugliest personality trait………………….Selfishness
    The most endangered species……………….Dedicated leaders
    The greatest “shot in the arm”………………Encouragement
    The greatest problem to overcome………….Fear

    Most effective sleeping pill…………..Peace of mind
    The most crippling failure disease………Excuses
    The most powerful force in life………….. ……..Love
    The most dangerous pariah……………………………A gossiper

    The Most and The Greatest Read More »

    Prayer: Lord we come to YOU

    Thank You Lord that You have been with us all year and that we have seen many things and also have had our trials and our struggles. We look to You for new life Lord and we know Your promises.

    We are glad that when we are not faithful… You Are
    and that we can come to You this day and grow in all that You are, learn new things every day and walk in Your Spirit which is life to us.

    The life You have for us is full of power and peace. We cannot even imagine peace on our own Lord too many things in our lives and relationships with our passions and anxieties.

    You are God — Lord God Almighty God and Your make a way into our hearts and our lives. You reach Lord where we don t even know what is there and You bring life from it.
    Nothing is beyond YOU.
    We cannot hide from YOU.
    No where can we go from Your spirit

    So Lord we come to YOU.
    Teach us.
    Root out those places where we hold pain
    where disease can settle
    and where fears can develop.

    Prayer: Lord we come to YOU Read More »

    What If Christmas Isn’t Merry?


    What pops into your mind when you think of Christmas?

    Colored lights, tinsel, festive decorations? Familiar music, parties, family gatherings? Joy, the promise of a Savior, God with us?

    How about death, loss, and grief? That’s probably not what you expected.

    Christmas is a time for glad tidings of great joy, but we also must be sensitive to those for whom the holiday invokes painful memories and highlights difficult circumstances. This isn’t the cheeriest of holiday greetings. I hope you’ll forgive me for reminding us that we’re likely to encounter folks that can’t quite share our holly-jolly spirit.

    What If Christmas Isn’t Merry? Read More »