As a man thinks…
Recently, a young girl, struggling with eating disorders, posted a sentiment on Facebook, entitled, “Welcome to my head.” Here were some of the things comprising it: 
Worthless
Ugly
Fat
Weak
Stupid
Failure
Never good enough
It’s sad and frustrating to see this yet again and still. It can be so naturally built into us, can’t it?
How is Your Thinking? Read More »
With so much emphasis on body image and attractiveness, there’s often discussion about the word, “normal.” Supposedly, everyone wants to be the embodiment of that word. But we tend to possess a distorted definition of it. Its actual definition reads as follows:
It’s that second definition. Don’t we often get so caught up in the conforming and the “standard” that we bypass that healthy definition altogether?
I know I did.
Once I was heavily entrenched in my eating disorder behaviors, it became all about conforming to a standard. I wanted to be “normal,” to look like “everyone else.”
I recently found out June is candy month. Huh? I know. It started me thinking. Typically, the “candy holidays” are geared more toward autumn and winter: Christmas, Valentine’s Day and, of course, Halloween. So, no one really thinks candy when they think the summer season, right?
I remember my college days when, of the many wacky disordered eating patterns and crash diets, I went on a “candy diet.” Nothing but candy, day in, day out, for a period of time. I’m surprised every tooth in my head did not rot and fall out. Grace of God.
And then I hit a point in my life/recovery in which sugar was taboo. Keep that demonic white stuff away from me! To say I was paranoid was an understatement! I felt it would “do me in” if I had the tiniest trace of it.
Years later, I’m more at peace with the candy situation. It’s not been an easy road, but scripture has helped me tremendously. It’s the cliché moderation stuff. You know…
Happy Candy Month! – Being at Peace with Sweets Read More »
As a recovering eating disorder sufferer, I’m keenly aware of the perfectionistic component to the creation, maintenance and challenging treatment of the disease. It’s often an uphill battle. Perfectionism, fueled by deep anxiety and pressure, can kill. According to statistics…
So, the word “perfect” is not just a word; it can be a threat.
The perfectionistic person, in recovery or not, is therefore, left to grapple with its meaning for his/her life. How important is it?
Should We Strive for Perfection or Effectiveness? Read More »
Say not thou, I will recompense evil; but wait on the Lord, and he shall save thee. Proverbs 20:22
Do not be in a hurry. Let anger cool down. Say nothing and do nothing to avenge yourself. You will be sure to act unwisely if you take up the club and fight your own battles; and, certainly, you will not show the spirit of the Lord Jesus. It is more noble to forgive and let the offense pass. To let an injury burn inside and to think about revenge is to keep old wounds open and to make new ones. It is better to forget and forgive.
Forgetting and Forgiving Read More »
1 Corinthians 5:9-13 RSV
I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with immoral men; not at all meaning the immoral of this world, or the greedy and robbers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But rather 
I wrote to you not to associate with any one who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or robber—not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? God judges those outside. “Drive out the wicked person from among you.”
If we, the Church, were more obedient to God’s Word, churches would probably be much smaller. Paul’s admonition here is for Christians not to associate with those bear “the name of brother” if:
Do We Truly Love or are We Only Loving Ourselves? Read More »
When thinking of pornography and Christianity and the issue of control, things get quite interesting. Matthew 18:3 informs us:
On the other hand it seems intuitive that the repetitive use of pornography is proof that our “internal adolescent” has wrested away the controls in the command center of our brain and what is needed is a return of control to the superego. We long for simple joys, simple trust, unconditional love but there is no denying that we physically are no longer children and we can get into some very big trouble.
Pornography, Christianity and Control Read More »
We’re commanded in Hebrews 12:1 to “lay aside every weight” so we can “run with patience the race that is set before us.” Consider that first command: lay aside every weight, every burden that slows us down in our race forward. If we’re dwelling on the past, that means we’ve stopped running, picked up some weights we were commanded to drop, and are giving them (not God or His commandments and His service) all our attention. No wonder we stop running and even start walking backward. For good reason do race horses wear blinders that force them to look forward, blocking out distractions so they can focus on the race.
Even worse, Hebrews 12:1 continues on into the second verse, explaining what we should be looking at when we run the race “set before us” (set in front of us): “Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher ofour faith.” If we’re looking at the past, we’re violating this second command of God’s: we’re not only picking up weights and burdens we were told to lay aside, to drop to the ground and regard as worthless impediments, but we’re not looking at Jesus but rather at those forbidden weights instead. We should be rejoicing that Christ tells us to drop all these weights. Satan’s worst enemy is a Christian focused on the future and running his race well.
Carrying the Burdens of Your Past? Read More »
Ask Angie: My husband is an alcoholic. Although I have committed to staying with him, I can’t help but regard him with disgust even AFTER he’s been drinking. Thanks to the biblical principles you teach, I’m learning how to detach when he’s drinking, but in the days following a drinking binge I don’t feel any affection for him. In the early days of our marriage (we’ve been married 20 years), I was able to warm up to him once the drinking passed. Now I am just filled with disgust. Please give me some advice. Thank you.
Marriage Guidance: We commend you for your commitment to your marriage. This shows your love for God and your willingness to please Him and do His will. You are an inspiration for others who are living with an alcoholic spouse.
Your feelings are understandable seeing that some alcoholics can be sloppy in behavior and unclean in appearance and habits. The behaviors and appearance of the alcoholic can cause much resentment build up, which is what’s happening with you. You are just now learning to detach and part of detachment is separating the alcoholic behaviors and sickness from the person you met, loved and married. When we allow the alcoholic behaviors to overtake our own thoughts we will become disgusted and resentful over the alcoholic, even during bouts of sobriety.
Married to an Unbelieving Alcoholic Read More »
Beyond the emotionally tumultuous days of the first few weeks of sobriety, people in addiction recovery then move into a second phase of early recovery. As their mind and body begin to function on a more normal basis, a new crop of emotions begin to surface. Once of the first, and most important of these is anger.
A. Emotions are not moral
Emotions in Recovery: Anger Read More »
