One Day at a Time

I was Close to Hell, Then Jesus Set Me Free

When Jesus saved me I was close to hell
The devil had me in a deep dark well
Yes I found Jesus or did He find me
It doesn’t matter, He set me free

Now the road I’m walkin’ ain’t all up hill
As I try to follow my saviors will
yes I found Jesus or did He find me
It doesn’t matter, He set me free

He guides my footsteps He leads the way
and I will follow come what may
Yes I found Jesus or did He find me
It doesn’t matter, He set me free

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22 Years of Active Addiction

My story is really way to long for me to share my 22 years as a prescription addicted to opiates, sedatives, hypnotics, barbiturates, and marijuana. I can tell you however that I am now 47 years old, and in the process of getting my Chemical Dependency Counselors license in Texas. I am also a licensed southern baptist preacher. I have been clean five years.

At one time in my life, scoring and cracking scripts was all I did. The final two years of my addiction darn near cost me my life, as well as my whole family. My wife and I have been married 15 years. The first 10 were spent in drug addiction. Both of us strung out.

Jesus answered my hearts desire to be clean, and delivered me, and my wife on the same day. I haven’t looked back since.

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I had 14 Felony Counts

I had to walk through tough times with the courts. I had 14 felony counts. Three counts of sales, loaded handgun, stolen property etc…. When I had my day in court, I was 5 months clean and sober, with two treatment facilities under my belt. I was sentenced to 1 year county jail (not prison) and three years felony probation. The effort I put forth on “changing” my lifestyle (before my court date) made a big difference in the way the Courts, Probation and the District Attorney viewed my case. This year in jail was probably the best thing that happened to me. I see now that I was not arrested, I was rescued.

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Jailed Twice Before I was 18 for Selling Drugs

I grew up in an alcoholic family. Both my father and my mother came from alcoholic homes as well. I lost a brother to a drunk driving accident. He was 24. Because I grew up in such a very chaotic home, I was running the streets from an early age.

I had my first drinking experience was when I was just twelve years old. I was “turned on” to pot at age fourteen, and went to jail twice for selling marijuana, hashish, and LSD, before I was eighteen years old.

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Lisa and Gambling

Addiction is a powerful bondage that binds us to the sins of the world. It is an evil spirit that is sent by Satan into our lives to deceive us and destroy our lives ever so slowly. It is like a long, long line that he has hooked us with and is ever so slowly reeling us closer and closer. When you get close enough he has you in his grasp forever. All the fun that you thought you were having along the way is over and you live a life of hell.

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Living a Double Standard

My feelings of guilt and shame towards a same-sex attraction began at an early age. I experienced frequent sexual abuse from an older male friend during most of my teen years, and hustling for money soon followed.

Years later, I was baptized in a Mennonite Brethren church as a public declaration that I would follow Christ. My secret desire was that maybe now my attraction and sexual fantasies towards men would disappear. They didn’t, and the fantasies soon turned into years of acting out behaviours.

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Manifest the Life of Christ in Our Daily Living

True religion will manifest itself in every phase of life. We sit down in the quiet and read our Bible–and get our lesson. We know it now–but we have not as yet got it into our life–which is the thing we must really do.

Knowing that we should love our enemies, is not the ultimate thing–actually loving our enemies is.

Knowing that we should be patient, is not all–we are to practice the lesson of patience, until it has become a habit in our life.

Many know the cardinal duties of Christian life–who yet have not learned to live them. It is living them, however, that is true religion.

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Take Your Time and Easy Does It

All to often, people fail in their recovery attempts only because they were in a hurry. Even in recovery…things take time.

For alcoholics and addicts, it is especially true that difficulties play an enormous part in our lives. They call forth our power, our strength, and our energies as nothing can. But when clean and sober, sometimes they strengthen character.

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Get to a Meeting

If you want to remain clean and sober, I suggest that you get to a meeting, and frequently.

Early in my recovery, there was one thing that I did tire of – the act of defending myself. I was so occupied with convincing others that I was not using, it seemed certain that I was. So, in the hopes of eliminating that annoyance, I started going to meetings. I chose to do doing something that came highly recommended – I began to just listen. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t share, but in the beginning just sit quietly and pay attention. The first couple of meetings may surprise you. With the exception of one or two, the people around you look normal, healthy, content, satisfied, and to some degree – successful. They do not look like winos, drunkards, junkies, or residents of skid row.

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