Alcoholism is running rampant today, even in Christian’s homes! Scripture tells us we are not to get drunk on too much wine because it causes sin. But the bible says a believer in Christ is saved through the death of Jesus. Does that mean the alcoholic Christian is saved too? Understand that living a righteous life in Jesus Christ is what gives the Christian eternal life. Being “saved” is a rebirth process and lifestyle change from walking in darkness to walking in the light. Do you think an alcoholic walks in the light or in the dark? Ok, then, there’s your answer.
Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Ephesians 5:18 NIV
Anyone who drinks to get drunk is not living a righteous life in Jesus Christ. An alcoholic is enslaved and controlled by the drink. Yes, it is true, Christian’s sin, but they do not continue living in that sin, unless they are in fact, not Christian. If we know that drinking too much alcohol leads to sin then we should not do it. Maybe we should never have that first drink so we won’t even have to worry about becoming an alcoholic.
I hear many horror stories from the spouse of an alcoholic, usually the wife, who is at wits end trying to tolerate her abusive husband and still maintain her marriage in some sort of congenial and organized fashion I tell them straight out, stop enabling the alcoholic. But many times not helping them is easier said than done, especially if the addict is emotionally abusing them, which is almost always the case.
An alcoholic will manipulate, abuse, and control everyone in the home if you allow him or her to. If the alcoholic is not in denial anymore and begins to recognize they have a problem, they may tell you over, and over, and over again that they will stop drinking – they may even set a date and time for this big event. But he never stops when he says he will! So stop believing him!
Trusting in what an alcoholic says or does is literally impairing your own mental and emotional thought patterns. The alcoholic makes you weak with them. In many ways, the alcoholic works through others to live – its how they get by for so many years drinking without becoming a skid row bum. As long as the alcoholic is getting help by you for him to keep slurping down that booze, nothing will ever change in your life and marriage, and I mean nothing!
This does not mean that once you stop enabling the alcoholic they will end up a hopeless, helpless bum. On the contrary, unless they can get someone else to help them to drink themselves to death, they will most likely seek help for themselves. The simple fact is if a Christian is abusing alcohol than he has fallen from Christ and he should deal with this moral issue accordingly. If they are not Christian, then that is one less reason why they should quit.
For the alcoholic, it is not just about going to rehabilitation or going to Alcoholic’s Anonymous that will help them to stop drinking, it is the willingness to move forward with their life, realizing their potential, and becoming the productive person God intends them to be. They don’t need alcohol; it’s only a crutch they use to make their life seem more bearable. But that is a lie too. In my opinion the one and only true way to get through the deceptions of the disease is through the workings of God. Rehab and AA are secondary to surrendering yourself to God. An alcoholic drinks because they need inner healing. Once they get to the root of their emotional wounds, they will be able to stop drinking for good! That’s all there is to it.
Do you expect too much from the alcoholic in your life? Expectations will keep you on an emotional roller coaster ride with the alcoholic. They will bring you down and they will bring you up, and back down again. Whew, are you ready to get off that emotional ride and live your life? Understand that you cannot make the alcoholic come off the roller coaster with you. No, it does not work like that. First you come off and later when you are ready, you can slowly help them off.
Let the alcoholic know how much you love and care for them, but let them know too, you do not love the disease!! Therefore you will not help them to kill themselves anymore! Tough love is the way to go when dealing with the devastation of alcoholism in a loved one.