Boundaries

My husband is verbally mean to me. What can I do about it?

My husband is verbally mean to me. What can I do about it?

Often, people are verbally abusive with derogatory statements, insults and negativity because of personal feeling of inadequacy. Some people truly believe that the only time they can look good is when the others around them look bad. I can think of a specific personal instance in which a friend of mine married a man who always put her down in public. My immediate reaction was always that his actions made him look small and quite inferior.

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Why won’t my parents let me grow up and have more freedom?

Why won’t my parents let me grow up and have more freedom?

Growing up is very difficult—for both you and your parents. They remember a little bundle of joy that they held and nurtured as a baby and now they see a budding adult. These days, children face things and know about things that their parents would never have imagined at the same age. The teenagers of today look older, act older and want to be older than their counterparts did just 20 years ago. It is the desire of all Christian parents that their children know Christ at an early age and then walk with Him for the rest of their lives. They are called by God to work towards that end.

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Do I need to set limits with my child?

Do I need to set limits with my child?

Yes. They need those fences. They need to know the difference between right and wrong. This shows them that you care. Children who are not looked after by their parents, those who roam free, tend not to have any morals or convictions when dealing with right or wrong. They cannot cope in the real world.

“Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Prov. 22:6).

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Should we teach our kids that it is good to fight back?

In what circumstances, if any, do we teach our kids that it is good to fight back?

There is a big difference between defending and protecting oneself from severe harm and seeking revenge. Differentiating between these two extremes is very difficult for a child. That is why Christians have maintained a standard of not fighting back. Children, by human nature, will almost always lash out at their enemy, even if they are not in any danger. They become angry and unreasonable in the face of a wrongdoing directed toward them.

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Keeping “Professional Distance”

Some schools actually instruct therapists not to “insert their own personalities” into the counseling process and discourage them from sharing anything at all about themselves with counselees. Yet. I believe that it is possible to maintain a balance between over-involvement and being so objective that those we work with never see our “human” side.

A. The benefits of “self-revelation” in the counseling process
There are many good reasons to share our own spiritual journeys with those we seek to help, especially if we ourselves have overcome an addiction to drugs and alcohol.

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