You have not failed because you relapse. You are normal because you relapse. We all have relapsed when trying to find our way out of the alcohol and drug trap. Never allow a relapse to discourage you from coming to sobriety. As a matter of fact, when we succumb to our addictions we can actually learn from them. Most of us fall back on our addictions for many reasons and here are three of those reasons. See if they ring a chord with you as well.
The first reason is because we just weren’t ready in our heart to stop the addiction – we felt anxious and fearful being without our best friend, and so our uncommitted heart caved in under pressure. We have all done it. Think of addiction as a “hard to break bad habit.” But don’t fret too much over it. Just because you’re not ready to quit now, certainly does not mean that you won’t be committed later. Keep trying and don’t give up!
Have you ever listened to the little voice in your head telling you that your addiction is ok? You know the voice – the reliable little guy that keeps telling you reasons why it’s okay to keep feeding your addiction. It goes something like this. “I’m not really addicted, I can stop at anytime” or about this one. “If I was not married to so and so, I would not need to drink anymore.” We have all heard this one. “My life is just too stressful and I only need it to unwind.” We hear the voice and we listen because the voice is a symptom of addiction.
Same Friends – Same Places
Now I am sure you have all heard the old adage, “birds of a feather flock together”, right? Well, it is very true! We relapse because we have not changed our friendships and lifestyle. But a newly sober addict cannot be around the same people or places they were in before – it’s like driving with a blindfold on, hoping you can stay in your own lane. Whewy! Life comes at you fast when we aren’t taking the needed precautions that we ought to.
Lack of Supportive Friendships or Collaboration
It is difficult to be alone and remain sober. We all need friendships, especially encouraging ones that we can go to when we are feeling down. It is never a good idea to be in negative relationships when trying to overcome our addictions. We need to choose friends that are REAL friends – they hang in there with you when the going gets tough and they help you get tougher. These kinds of birds are harder to find, but if you hang out in the same places as these birds you’ll find some great friends.
“You’d be surprised how much fun you can have sober. When you get the hang of it”. – Joe (Jack Lemmon) in Days of Wine and Roses, 1962