Understanding and Living our Relationships According to God

... diligently seek him. Hebrews 11:6

Who do we have relationships with? What are our most important relationships? How should we handle our relationships with others? Is our interaction with others pleasing to God?

Who do we have relationships with?

    1. God/Christ
    2. Spouse
    3. Children
    4. Extended family (parents, grandparents, uncles, nieces -- etc)
    5. Friends
    6. Co-workers and acquaintances

What are our most important relationships? (In this order)

    1. God / Jesus Christ
    2. Spouse
    3. Children
    4. Family
    5. Friends/Others

Most people manage their relationships inappropriately. They simply manage their relationships with no understanding or biblical basis whatsoever. The churches don't properly teach about how we should handle our relationships either -- in fact many church leaders have relationship problems -- and then teach its ok to divorce and get remarried!! It's sad but true.

EXAMPLE: Some married women put their friends, family and children first, before their husbands. How do they do this? They look to them for wisdom and guidance concerning their marriage, instead of listening to God and HIS HOLY WORD already established for a smooth running marriage. We'll talk more about this later in this newsletter.

How should we handle our relationships?

Our first priority has to be with putting our Trust and Faith with God. We do that by "getting to know"? God in our life and having a personal and growing relationship with Him. Well, how do we do that? What does the bible say about having a relationship with God?

(Understand: without having a relationship with God first, we will not know how to have a sincere relationship with our spouse, children, and all others properly.)

There are many relationship problems in the world today because people have a difficult time expressing themselves, and or, they think selfishly, and or, they have trouble forgiving, and -- .they don't put God FIRST. They do not "understand"? that we (Christ-ones) are to go to God for our wisdom and guidance!!

The root of relationship problems is not having a relationship with our Lord, Jesus Christ.

The world is full of superficialities and things we do for "appearance sake"? and as long as we stay wrapped up with worrying about what others think about us we cannot and we will not be able to please our Father. We will remain stunted in our relationship with Him. We can't grow spiritually if we're too concerned about what others think of us.

What does the bible say about our relationship with God

We are asked to SEEK God! Is going to church enough? Is that where we can have a relationship with Him?

    The LORD is with you, while ye be with him; and if ye seek him, he will be found of you; but if ye forsake him, he will forsake you. Chronicles 15:2

Many folks think all they have to do is "go to church and listen to the preacher talk about God"?. But does this truly help you have a growing relationship with God? We don't think it does because it is "leading you to believe"? this comfort level and that this is all you have to do -- God wants YOUR heart and mind.

Your interactions with God, the Father is a personal one, which has nothing at all to do with "going to a church building"?.

Your relationship with God does not come between you and a cleric but comes to you alone and only through you. Someone else cannot have faith for you and they can't save you; they can't have a relationship with God for you, not even your spouse. Church doesn't save people, you have to save yourself.

    1. You have to communicate (express yourself) to God with sincerity

    2. You have to understand your conscience (not someone else's) and what you know to be right and good living

    3. You must study the bible and then come to know the "whole idea of Christ's ministry and what God's will is for your life

    4. You then must seek out how your life can please Him in every which way and in every day!

    5. Seeking God is something, we must do, not what someone else can do for us!!

If anyone is not doing the things that God asks of them through His WORD, they DO NOT have a relationship with Jesus Christ / God.

How often do we have a relationship with some man or woman standing on a podium that's just talking about God? How often do we see and understand God through the eyes of this person? Does this bring us a personal relationship with God? Doubtful! This is why God asks us to go into a closet where no one is looking and pray and communicate with Him.

People have the closest relationship with the Father when they are in private prayer talking with God. It is no one's business what we pray about, what we talk to God about and when we do it!! Our relationship with the Lord is no one else's concern because it is between YOU and Him! God does not care if you do or do not eat a piece of broken up bread and a sip of grape juice in a building, but God does care if you live your life in faith of Him. Which one is sincerity?

Some people, those without faith, need to do "for show"? rituals to make themselves feel like they are righteous people. But have you ever thought about what these church rituals are doing to please God? Jesus often talks about this "for show"? attitude with the Pharisees. And -- they didn't believe that Christ was the Messiah. Are we like the Pharisees in our attitude?

Diligently Seek Him

But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. Hebrews 11:6

The bible tells us that to have a relationship with Christ we must diligently seek Him. This is how we know that "going to church"? and going through the "appearance"? of rituals is not enough, He wants more from us!

We have to give Him our life in the way we live, not just "go to church"? and carry out rituals. Some people think just because they went through the baptismal ritual they are automatically saved -- NOT!

Some of you reading this may think we hate secular church. But that's not entirely correct, we don't hate church, we hate what the worldly churches do to people -- it makes them lax in their Christian lifestyle and it makes them think and behave self-righteously and it makes them worship pastors and worldly institutions and people -- and it makes people think that a church building is only where God is.

Going to church is not having a relationship with God; far from it.

God wants from us to --

    1. Diligently Seek Him
    2. Pray Sincerely in private
    3. Give Him Our Hearts and Our Minds
    4. LIVE out Christ's ministry and "be the church"? -- not just "go to church"?

-- but if ye forsake him, he will forsake you. Chronicles 15:2

Apostle Paul calls it a race, a race to the finish line. Are we running the race or just going through the motions of pretending as though we are in the race. If you're in the race then there is no need for "appearance sake"? actions because God doesn't care about those things --

-- diligently seek him. Hebrews11:6

DILIGENCE, n. [L., to love earnestly; to choose.] Noah Webster

    1. Steady application in business of any kind; constant effort to accomplish what is undertaken; exertion of body or mind without unnecessary delay or sloth; due attention; industry; assiduity.

    Diligence is the philosopher's stone that turns every thing to gold.

    Brethren, give diligence to make your calling and election sure. 2 Peter 1.

    2. Care; heed; heedfulness.

    Keep thy heart with all diligence. Proverbs 4.

It's interesting how the Noah Webster Dictionary says that Diligence means "to choose" and to "love earnestly"?

    Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. Hebrews 12:1

A lot of people that claim Christianity aren't even in the race but standing on the sidelines watching and thinking they know everything. Unfortunately standing around (sitting in the church pews on Saturday and Sunday) isn't going to get us very far with God or with our fleshly relationships. Remember: if we aren't working to have a relationship with God and putting Jesus Christ first in our lives, then how do we know how to carry out our fleshly relationships, like marriage?

Once we have our relationship with God up and running (growing and learning) we can now have a much better relationship with everyone else. If our relationship with Jesus Christ is good so will be our relationship with our spouse.

How does God want us to love our spouse?

God wants us to love with sincere love! Once you understand what sincere love is then you can begin to practice it on a daily basis with your spouse. The root cause of marital troubles is insincerity between couples.

Just to give you an idea of what sincere love is, here are a few points that are practiced in marriage that are not sincerity but deception. (Anyone who truly wants to do the will of God would NOT exhibit character traits that go against the will of God.)

Remember: God created marriage and God established all that is needed (precepts and principles) for marriage to run smoothly.

Something that many people miss is God created marriage and all of the precepts for a happy marriage are already established by the Creator in HIS WORD -- so then why do we go to the world for marriage help? Why do we look to the world for marital wisdom? The world absolutely does NOT know how to keep your marriage together!!

    1) Wives: Bossy and domineering; these symptoms are labeled as "feminism"? "“ God commands wives submit to their husband's in every thing. When a woman feels the need to take control it is because she doesn't trust her husband -- she doesn't trust that her husband can take care of matters and make decisions -- because she doesn't trust in God!

    2) Husbands: Allow their wives to be in control; when a husband cowers under his wife's authority and control it is because he doesn't have a relationship with God / Jesus Christ. He doesn't trust in God. He is also a feminist and believes that somehow it is ok for his wife to be the man in the marriage. But this is NOT what God has established for marriage!! Hence -- DIVORCE.

    Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Ephesians 5:24

What part of the above verse are married couples not getting?

Oddly enough women understand what it means to submit to a boss for a paycheck. Every day they go out into the workforce and submit (slave) their lives to a job or company and they don't have any issues doing that. But in marriage they have trouble cleaning their homes and submitting to their own husbands. Now what would you call this? My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Hosea 4:6

HUSBANDS NEED TO TAKE BACK THEIR GOD-GIVEN JOB OF BEING THE MAN in the marriage!!

    For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Ephesians 5:23

-- diligently seek him. Hebrews 11:6

Truth is, marriages all over the world are falling apart because we're not diligently seeking Him. We don't have the Godly knowledge to understand how to keep our marriage together. We've built our house on sand and our relationship with our spouse is crumbling --

We are having trouble with our marriage because we don't know how to have a sincere relationship with the CREATOR of marriage!!

Many people say marriage is hard but marriage is NOT that difficult when you make God number One in your personal life!

God will give you knowledge and show you the way -- if you --

-- diligently seek him. Hebrews 11:6

-- behold, I send you forth as lambs among wolves!!! Luke 10:3

-- Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. Matthew 10:16

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Copyright by Angie Lewis.
All rights reserved. Used by permission.
Angie is a noted author of

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