Marriage

How Do I Detach From an Alcoholic Spouse?


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To detach with love from the alcoholic means to not allow what they do while drinking harm your emotional and or spiritual well being.

Detaching with love is something learned that over time becomes a habit-a good habit actually.

How Can I Deal with My Alcoholic Spouse?

Ask Angie: I have been married to an alcoholic for 16 years. I have detached in love and have been very active in my church and creating a life for me and my children outside of the alcoholism. The alcoholic in my life doesn't seem to mind any of this and it actually seems to relieve him from the responsibility to be a dad and husband. He does work hard on his job and so he feels that’s all of his responsibility and likes when he's home to drink all day and play video games and ignore us. I hate being with him. It's a very lonely marriage. My two older children are becoming more upset by his lack of desire to be with them.

Becoming Self-sufficient in the Lord

Ask Angie: Since the husband's role is to provide, what do we do in these economic times when he has not been able to find a job? Not being able to provide puts him in a precarious position and tensions rise. We are living in my mother's basement and not being in our own home is hard on him. We argue often and moments of harmony and peace are short lived. We also have three kids to think about - the last being 11 months old and this is another added stress. I pray. I read. What more? What do you suggest?

Take Your Time: Step Knowledgably into Marriage

by Andrea Schwartz
Love at first sight may seem to work out perfectly in novels and film, but rarely are first impressions true or lasting. Along with this myth comes the illusion that family background, religious orientation, and lifetime experiences are of little-to-no importance when it comes to committing to lifelong marriage. Young people smitten by the love bug believe the age-old lies that love will keep them together and that love is all they need. However, doing things God's way remains the touchstone for successful covenant marriage.

Do You Love Well?

For God is not unjust to forget your work and labor of love which you have shown toward His name, in that you have ministered to the saints, and do minister...This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil. Romans 12:9-11

Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honor. Do not lag in zeal, be ardent in spirit, serve the Lord. Romans 12:9-10 NRS

Our Words and Deeds are Irrevocable

"But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken!" Matthew 12:36


We cannot recall any word we have spoken. It may be a false word or an unkind word--a word which will blast and burn! Instantly after it has been spoken--we may wish it back and may rush after it and try to stop it--but there is no power in the world that can unsay the hurtful word--or blot it out of our life!

Workshop: Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery

Obie-Host Welcome to the "Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery" Workshop!
We are glad you could join us.
Who would like to open us in prayer this evening?
Heavenly Father.....
We ask that You anoint our speaker Michael tonight.....
as he speaks to us....
open our hearts and our minds to Your truths....
help us to share openly and honestly with one another....
lead those who are in need of fellowship to this workshop....
in the name of Jesus we pray. Amen.

Tonight our speaker is Michael Clark. He is a Chaplain, Biblical Counselor and Speaker.
He is also in recovery himself.
Michael will talk for a period of time after which we will open the floor to questions for him.
I now introduce to you Michael.
You now have the floor Michael.

Love: Who is #1?

Ask Angie: If I as a person am #1 who can I help? Love is not self-seeking. If I seek to help myself first who matters after me? If I choose to help others first am I not full filled? Love is the greatest commandment. So why can't we love?

Stop Rescuing the Alcoholic and Start Rescuing You

Ask Angie: Dear Angie, I have been married to an alcoholic husband for eight years now and we have two young children together. We have taken marriage courses and I have been reading the Love Dare. I have tried the detach method but it is difficult since he starts drinking every day at around 9 or 10 in the morning (since he was laid off over six months ago) and drinks until he goes to bed which is usually midnight. If I don't talk to him when he's drinking he gets angry. How can I make the detachment work in this situation and how can I protect our children from his anger?

The Redefinition of Marriage: An Exercise in Moral and Cultural Suicide

In 1993, Sen. Daniel P. Moynihan (D- N.Y.) published "Defining Deviancy Down ." Moynihan started from Emile Durkheim's proposition that there is a limit to the amount of deviant behavior any community can "'afford to recognize' and that, accordingly, we have been re-defining deviancy so as to exempt much conduct previously stigmatized, and also quietly raising the 'normal' level in categories where behavior is now abnormal by any earlier standard. This redefining has evoked fierce resistance from defenders of ‘old' standards, and accounts for much of the present 'cultural war. . .

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