Codependency

Friends & Family of Addicts & Dysfunctional PeoplePremium Content

I write this article at a point in my life when I have a friend who is a recovering alcoholic and a recovering narcotic addict. It is a timely message for me and one that needs to be written and well read by many people.

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Step 7 and Humility

Step 7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Jesus said:
Matthew 18:3-4 KJV
"Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

Without true, honest, heartfelt humility we can not recover; We can not enter the kingdom of heaven.

What's Love Got to Do With It?

What does love have to do with recovery? EVERYTHING! Easily a book could be written on this subject but I only have a few lines, so here goes.

Lack of self-love results in a tremendous amount of inner pain. Low self-esteem often leads people to look to sources outside of themselves for the love that they do not feel for themselves. This can result in "looking for love in all the wrong places" like same sex relationships, drugs, abusive relationships, codependent relationships, eating too much, alcohol, improper sexual relationships, etc. Or one might try medicating the pain with drugs, alcohol, food, gambling, etc.

Sponsorship and CodependencyPremium Content

Falling into codependency is a real danger for both sponsors and sponsees in recovery. First, some definitions to clarify what is being discussed here:

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Codependency FAQPremium Content

What is Codependency?
There are probably as many definitions of codependency as there are people who consider themselves to be codependent. Basically, if you identify with the posts here, and with the info in the books found on the subject, you might consider yourself to be codependent.

In "Codependent No More," Melody Beattie gives several definitions. She includes Earnie Larsen's definition:

    "Those self-defeating, learned behaviors or character defects that result in a diminished capacity to initiate or to participate in loving relationships."

Melody Beattie's own definition is:

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Codependent Relapse ChecklistPremium Content

Early Warning Signs

    Situational loss of daily structure.
    Lack of personal care
    Inability to effectively set and maintain limits
    Loss of constructive planning
    Indecision
    Compulsive behavior
    fatigue or lack of rest

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Recovery from Abuse and Life's Hardships Workshop - TranscriptPremium Content

note: Members can discuss this workshop in the Message Boards HERE

Jan Coates is our guest speaker this evening. She is the author of
Set Free: God's Healing Power for Abuse Survivors and Those Who Love Them

After she is finished speaking we will open the floor up to questions from the audience. Enjoy!

SETFREE:

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The Power of Brokenness - TranscriptPremium Content

note: Members can discuss this workshop in the Message Boards HERE

Tonight our guest speaker is Glen Kirby. He is the author of the wonderful Biblical resource and workbook for Christian recovery "The Power of Brokenness: The Language of Recovery".

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Conquering Codependency: A Christ Centered 12 Step ProcessPremium Content

Conquering Codependency: A Christ Centered 12 Step Process is a very detailed and helpful booklet to help you understand, conquer and overcome codependent behaviors.

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