Accountability

Applying "Old School" A.A. in Today's 12-Step FellowshipsPremium Content

What the First, Original, Akron A.A. Program Was and Did

The way the first three AAs-Bill W., Dr. Bob, Bill D.-got sober before there was a "Big Book." See The Dick B. Christian Recovery Guide, 3rd ed., 2010, pp. 57-59.

    1. There were no Steps;

    2. There were no Traditions;

    3. There was no "Big Book";

    4. There were no "drunkalogs" (of the kind seen today); and

    5. There were no meetings (of the kinds seen today).

Instead, each of the first three AAs:

    1. believed in God;

    2. was a Christian;

    3. asked God for deliverance; and

    4. received the requested deliverance from God.

The Summary by Frank Amos, Published in DR. BOB and the Good Oldtimers, page 131.

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Benefits of Having a Sponsor/Mentor/Recovery BuddyPremium Content

Would you like to have someone to talk to who can relate to what you're experiencing? Perhaps you would like to communicate with someone who has been through eating disorder recovery or other difficulties, but has made it to the other side. Maybe you desire some added support and encouragement.

Many in eating disorder recovery benefit from having a mentor, sponsor or recovery buddy. While mentoring is appropriate for basically any reason the one being mentored would like to have one, listed below are some common circumstances under a person might seek a mentor during eating disorder recovery.

1. While seeking diagnosis and treatment.

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"Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery" - Workshop TranscriptPremium Content

note: You may discuss this workshop in the Message Boards HERE

Obie-Host Welcome to the "Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery" Workshop
Please join me in welcoming Chaplain Michael Clark who will be leading the workshop. He is involved with Shadows of the Cross Ministries as well as Prison and Recovery Ministry. Chaplain Clark is a noted Speaker and Writer, Addiction Counselor/Professional as well as a Recovery Support Specialist. He will speak for several minutes after which we will open the floor for questions and comments from you for Chaplain Clark.

Let us open in prayer this evening.

Heavenly Father,
We ask Your blessings upon Chaplain Clark as he leads this workshop today.

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Bickering with Kevin: Discussions with an Accountability PartnerPremium Content

Over the years, I have shared how my friend Kevin and I bicker all the time. We bickered in the early years, when we first met and became accountability partners. We bickered during the ministry years, when we ran a Living Waters Program at our church. And we bicker in 2011, four years into Kevin’s decision to return to the gay lifestyle.

Although Kevin and I see each other a lot less socially nowadays, we sit within 4 feet of each other 8 hours a day, 5 days a week at our place of employment. We have been coworkers since 1999. This environment is very conducive getting on each other’s nerves and releasing all that pent-up irritation through bickering when we hang out.

These are some of our more-vivid bickering sessions:

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How Can I Deal with My Alcoholic Spouse?Premium Content

Ask Angie: I have been married to an alcoholic for 16 years. I have detached in love and have been very active in my church and creating a life for me and my children outside of the alcoholism. The alcoholic in my life doesn't seem to mind any of this and it actually seems to relieve him from the responsibility to be a dad and husband. He does work hard on his job and so he feels that’s all of his responsibility and likes when he's home to drink all day and play video games and ignore us. I hate being with him. It's a very lonely marriage. My two older children are becoming more upset by his lack of desire to be with them.

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Jesus Says "Sorry" Is A VerbPremium Content

“I’m sorry.” Why are those two little words so difficult to say?

I made a mistake. I need to apologize. It’s not that hard.

So why is it so hard?

Maybe there’s a better question. Why is it so hard to say I’m sorry and really mean it? Or even better, what does it mean to really mean it?

That’s the real question: what does “being sorry” really mean?

Apologize … and MEAN it

I know this will shock you, but I occasionally broke the rules as a kid. I recall my mom telling me to apologize to someone. I’d comply grudgingly, and she’d say, “Now go back and say it like you MEAN it.”

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A Lifelong Reconstruction ProjectPremium Content

One of the most sobering chapters in all of Scripture can be found in Deuteronomy 6. In this well-known portion of the Old Testament, we are informed that the Law of God is more than just a series of directives handed down by a Divine Deity. In fact, we learn that obeying the Law is not only a life-long pursuit, but a pursuit that can actually lead to a longer life (6:2). We are also told that obeying the Law is “for our good always and for our survival” (6:24). Further, we are tasked with the mission of not only obeying this Law ourselves, but of passing it on and teaching it to our children (6:6-7). Any one of these three components, when considered on its own, should be enough to convince us that God takes His Law seriously.

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Sponsor, Accountability Partner, Recovery Buddy: What's the Difference?

There may be some confusion about the difference between a recovery buddy/accountability partner and a sponsor. In AA, where much of the groundwork was laid for recovery, they use a sponsor/sponsee relationship.That requires someone who is spiritually mature and who has a firm foundation in recovery with many years under their belt to be the sponsor.

Unfortunately, the truth is that many people come to a group, get "recovered" and leave.They never give back.
That does two things:

  • it shortchanges them ("You have to give it away in order to keep it")
  • and

  • it short changes the newcomer (who needs someone to mentor them)

We Begin at the Lowest Grade

"Learn from Me"--for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." Matthew 11:29

Our Words and Deeds are Irrevocable

"But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken!" Matthew 12:36


We cannot recall any word we have spoken. It may be a false word or an unkind word--a word which will blast and burn! Instantly after it has been spoken--we may wish it back and may rush after it and try to stop it--but there is no power in the world that can unsay the hurtful word--or blot it out of our life!

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