Posts Tagged ‘rejection’

Are Problems Overwhelming You?

Monday, April 22nd, 2013

It is very hard to separate myself from my circumstances. it is almost as if I become my circumstances…. or they in some way absorb me. But I have to remember that I am not my circumstances. I am a child of God.. As His child I have an inheritance (Psalm 37:18) and that inheritance is peace, grace, mercy… the list is pretty long. Iit is peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:17) and sometimes when I am in the whirlwind of problems I have to remember to step outside of the whirlwind (remembering that I and the whirlwind are not one).

Take some deep breaths.
Take time out. (Matthew 14:23)
Be still and know that he is God. (Psalm 46:10)
Try to see things through the eyes of Christ and not my weak eyes….

Yes, the problems are very real and they are disconcerting.
But what is greater? God or my problems?
What is eternal? God or my problems?
Problems are almost always fleeting and never permanent. What is so today will not be true tomorrow.The only exception is God’s Truth. I choose to stand on that rock.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article !
Copyright 1992-2013 by S.O. Brennan

All rights reserved.

When Haters Celebrate Your Pain

Monday, April 15th, 2013

I try to avoid commenting on current events.

Today, I’m making an exception.

I imagine you’re aware of the tragic death of Matthew Warren, the 27-year-old son of Rick and Kay Warren. Matthew’s dad is one of America’s best-known Christian pastors. Rick Warren posted this statement on Facebook:

Grieving is hard. Grieving as public figures, harder. Grieving while haters celebrate your pain, hardest.

“…while haters celebrate your pain…”

Matthew committed suicide. He struggled with mental illness and depression that resisted medical care and family support and finally overwhelmed his ability to cope. He told his dad more than a decade ago that he knew he was going to heaven and just wanted the pain to end.

I understand. I’ve been at the bottom of a hole so deep I didn’t even realize it was a hole. I thought darkness was the way the world was and always would be. I didn’t blame God, I just figured that’s how it was, at least for me.

When you believe your entire world is darkness, you don’t think about escaping. Where are you going to go? You believe you have two choices. You can endure endless darkness with its fear and loneliness. Or you can die.

There’ve been many moments in which I wanted only to end the darkness, moments when I knew Jesus would welcome and forgive me and would understand that I couldn’t bear the pain any longer.

It’s pretty easy to judge and stigmatize those who battle depression and other forms of mental illness. It’s tempting to offer platitudes and dismiss us as weak or lazy.

My struggle with depression isn’t a choice or a mood or a spiritual weakness; it’s a physiological, medical issue. I try to live in gratitude for Relentless Grace and the people God used to rescue me from darkness. Those who judge Matthew’s actions condemn me as well.

The church was intended as a hospital, not a hall of fame. Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.” (Matthew 9:12)

I won’t rehash the hateful attacks leveled at a man and his family at a time when they deserve compassion, prayer, and support. But a couple of conclusions seem brutally, painfully obvious.

Let’s forgive. Hate is the end result of fear. We must demonstrate compassion toward those who are so fearful that they lash out at others when they’re most vulnerable.

“Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27-28)

Let’s stop shooting our own wounded. We’d like to believe this sort of fear and hate originates entirely outside the church. Sadly, not so.

You don’t have to agree with all of Rick Warren’s theology or his politics. I don’t. But this clearly isn’t the time for such discussions. This is the time to show the world who we are and how Jesus wants us to be identified.

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:35

Regardless of circumstances, when a child dies the response ought to be obvious.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Luke 6:31

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog HERE
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2013 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of: Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

The Right Kind Of Light

Monday, April 8th, 2013

I love the “social” part of social media. So often when I share an idea, someone out there offers something that gets me thinking deeper or in a slightly different direction.

Last time I concluded with this thought:

If you shine a light into a dark place, everyone, including you, sees a bit more clearly.

Cyndy, one of my Facebook friends, tossed out a really thought-provoking comment.

I think that is only true if you use a soft, warm light. If the light you use is too bright, too harsh, then most people are too busy closing or shielding their eyes to see at all.

What a great word picture for people who use truth as a weapon. I thought of an interrogation room with its hot, blinding glare, the cruel, unforgiving light used by the Pharisees to accuse, condemn, and control.

We need to speak truth, but we need to do it in love, in the context of relationship. Banging people over the head with truth before I’ve taken time to walk with them, know their story, and establish trust is assault, not evangelism.

Cyndy’s comment reminded me of John 1:14: The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

Grace without truth lacks light and simply prolongs darkness. Truth without grace is the harsh, glaring, accusatory light that causes people to shield their eyes.

We need to seek the wisdom to speak truth with the “soft, warm light” of grace.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog HERE
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2013 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

Submission isn’t Stupidity

Tuesday, February 5th, 2013

Ephesians 5:21: “Submit to one another.”

“Her husband is having an affair, and she knows it,” one of the ladies in Sunday school said. “He told his wife she can’t have her name on any of their accounts any longer, and she has to give him all the money.”

I sat in shock as I listened to that conversation.

The woman continued, “The Bible says she is supposed to submit to her husband.” She looked around at us and asked, “What is she supposed to do?”

“Submission isn’t stupidity,” I said. “She shouldn’t help her husband to sin by helping him to continue his affair and forget his marriage vows to her.”

Now the woman who talked to us about that situation raised her brows and stared at me. The others remained silent.

I explained that Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”

“What about verse 21?” I asked. “Had the woman forgotten about that verse too? And verse 28, ‘In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.’”

“That is the problem with taking a verse out of context to plead one’s case or satisfy one’s selfish desires.”

“Daily Bible study of a book or chapter with a Bible dictionary and concordance help me look at the context.”

Dear God, help me read the Bible in context daily. Amen.

Application:
  In what situation will you search the context of a Bible verse this week before you make a decision?

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog HERE
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article !

Copyright 2010-2013, Yvonne Ortega, LPC, LSATP, CCDVC

All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission.
Yvonne is a Speaker, Author, Counselor, Cancer Survivor and
serves on the Board of Directors of Christians in Recovery.
She is the author of Finding Hope for Your Journey through Breast Cancer.
If you would like to have her speak for your organization or church, please contact her through
her website: http://YvonneOrtega.com

Do You See People as Indiviuals or as Categories?

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2013

My friend Dick Foth has a way with phrases. Recently he described a spiritual ailment called “hardening of the categories (HTC).”

Those afflicted with this disease lose the ability to see individuals. Instead, they see people only in terms of their categories. It’s like the physical disease in which hardening of the arteries narrows the passageways and decreases flexibility. Those with HTC lose the ability to think flexibly. They become narrow minded.

You know what I mean. The guy with the dirty clothes and long hair, standing on the corner with a sign…when you get HTC you see a type of person, and you automatically know what they’re like because that’s just how those people are.

In Jesus’ day everybody knew about Samaritans and tax collectors. You didn’t have to bother knowing the person. His category was all that mattered.

HTC is a disease of convenience. The girl with all the tattoos is troubled and needs guidance. The guy in the wheelchair needs help or pity. The well-dressed lady is smart and has a lot to offer. Life’s a lot easier when you don’t have to bother with back stories.

I suspect we all have a bit of HTC. We all have some blind spots, pigeonholes into which we place certain classes of people. We need to ask Jesus to show us the places where we see groups rather than individuals.

Perhaps it’s appearance, political persuasion, culture, race, or …

What are your HTC areas?

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

If Someone is “Right” is it OK to Nuke Others?

Friday, January 18th, 2013

By nearly any definition, Aaron Swartz was a computer prodigy, a brilliant, eccentric young man. As a teenager he created some of the backbone Internet systems we take for granted and later campaigned for online transparency and freedom. You can read briefly about his life, legal issues, and tragic suicide here.

Like most folks with a cause, Swartz pushed boundaries and irritated powerful people. Eventually the government indicted him and threatened more than thirty years in prison.

We could debate the seriousness of his crimes—this article indicates that even his “victim” agreed that his principle outweighed any minor harm—but that’s not the point. In that same article, Harvard Law School Professor Lawrence Lessig makes a powerful observation:

“We need to get beyond the ‘I’m right so I’m right to nuke you’ ethics that dominates our time.” (emphasis mine)

Somehow, we’ve got to rise above the notion that my rights, or even being right, are transcendent.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1

Jesus died for my freedom. My rights, my liberty, don’t originate from a man-made constitution. They’re absolute, purchased at the cross. I am totally free, but…

“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. No one should seek their own good, but the good of others. 1 Corinthians 10:23-24

Jesus didn’t die for my rights. He died for what’s right.

Not always the same.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

But being right doesn’t change lives or hearts

Friday, January 11th, 2013

I’ve been thinking all week about our pastor’s weekend sermon. He talked about the story of Jesus and the woman caught in adultery. John 8:2-11

There’s so much to the story, but I can’t get past one fact: the Pharisees were willing to stone this woman—to death! Her life mattered less than their desire to trap Jesus and uphold their self-righteous legalism.

Look at the contrast. The so-called religious people were so concerned about stopping sin that they would kill to accomplish it. Jesus cared so much about a woman’s life—and yours, and mine—that He willingly died a humiliating death to save it.

We all know this story. All week I’ve been wondering whether we understand its lesson, whether anything has changed since the day that disgraced woman was thrown at Jesus’ feet.

Theology, sin, truth—they all matter. But being right doesn’t change lives or hearts.

The Pharisees wanted to be right because it made them powerful. Jesus loved people because He knew it worked.

Truth, without love, is simply noise.

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 1 Corinthians 13:1

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.
Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:
Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance
. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

Ever Been A Victim?

Wednesday, November 28th, 2012

I have.

I observed an all-too-familiar situation this weekend. The details don’t matter, but the principle is essential.

It sounds like the lyrics to a bad country song. When you look around at where you are, the one thing you know for sure is…there you are.

Circumstances just are. Perhaps we could have made better choices, done something different, to change things. Or maybe not. Doesn’t really matter, because that’s all in the past.

Wherever you are…there you are.

I’ve been there a million times and listened to the same stupid lie. You know, the one that says I’m stuck here with no choices. I’m a victim of my circumstances.

It’s a lie. I’m not a victim. Unless I choose to be.

Winston Churchill once said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” (I think they turned that into a country song, too.)

I can’t always choose my circumstances, where I stand (or sit). But I CAN choose my attitude. I can decide to give up and wallow in my misery. Or I can choose to face forward with hope, a confident expectation that God will keep His promises.

I don’t say that lightly. I don’t claim it’s easy, because I know from painful personal experience that it’s not.

But “victim” is a choice, one that limits options and makes dreams seem impossible. Hope is a choice, too.

Hope changes what’s possible.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

Is God Always Good?

Tuesday, November 20th, 2012

Recently it seems like a disproportionate number of folks in my extended circle have encountered various kinds of adversity—illness, financial setbacks, relationship struggles, and personal challenges.

I don’t want to seem uncaring or matter-of-fact about my friends’ pain. Actually, that’s not what I want to write about.

What strikes me is our tendency to celebrate a desirable outcome by highlighting God’s goodness.

Cancer disappears? God is great! Found a job? Praise God! Kids are healthy? Isn’t God good?

Of course God is good in each of those wonderful situations. But what about those times when things aren’t all roses and sunshine? Where’s God’s goodness when Mom’s cancer spreads? What happened to this good God when a little girl is kidnapped and, despite the collective prayers of an entire community, her abused body is discovered several days later?

When something like that happens, did God stop being good?

As my good friend Clark Osborn correctly observes, “The goodness of God isn’t measured by our circumstances.”

A year ago, Rich’s Ride reached New Orleans. That finish line represented more than the completion of a 1500-mile journey. It represented the culmination of a twenty-five year story of God’s faithfulness. If there was ever a day to proclaim, “God is good!” that was such a day.

But my mind goes back to the December morning in 1987 when I fell from a roof and shattered three vertebrae in my neck. I got out of bed as a relatively healthy mid-thirties guy who planned to referee a high school basketball game that evening. I fell asleep—sort of—paralyzed below my chest.

And God was good on that day as well. God was good as Jesus stood beside me and wept with me. God was, is, and always will be good.

Of course we ought to proclaim God’s incredible goodness in times of blessing and celebration.

But let’s be careful not to perceive God’s eternal, unchanging goodness through the lens of our limited worldly circumstances.

God IS good. Period.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

Nothing Happens by Accident or Chance

Sunday, November 11th, 2012

“The very hairs of your head are all numbered!” Matthew 10:30

What a promise is this! All that befalls you, to the very numbering of your hairs–is known to God! Nothing can happen by accident or chance. Nothing can elude His inspection. The fall of the forest leaf–the fluttering of the insect–the waving of the angel’s wing–the annihilation of a world–all are equally noted by Him! Man speaks of great things and small things–but God knows no such distinction.

How especially comforting to think of this tender solicitude with reference to His own covenant people–that He metes out all  their joys–and all their sorrows! Every sweet–and every bitter–is ordained by Him. Even “wearisome nights” are “appointed.” Not a pang I feel, not a tear I shed–but is known to Him. What are called “dark dealings,” are the ordinations of undeviating faithfulness. Man may err–his ways are often crooked; “but as for God–His way is perfect!” He puts my tears into His bottle. Every moment His everlasting arms are underneath and around me. He keeps me “as the apple of His eye.” He “bears” me as a man bears his own son!

Do I look to the FUTURE? Is there much of uncertainty and mystery hanging over it? It may be, much foreboding of evil. Trust Him! All is marked out for me. Dangers will be averted; bewildering mazes will show themselves to be interlaced and interweaved with mercy. “He keeps the feet of His saints.” Not a hair of their head will be touched.

He leads sometimes darkly, sometimes sorrowfully; most frequently by cross and circuitous ways, which we ourselves would not have chosen; but always wisely, always tenderly. With all its mazy windings and turnings, its roughness and ruggedness–the believer’s is not only a right way–but the right way–the best which covenant love and wisdom could select.

“Nothing,” says Jeremy Taylor, “does so establish the mind amid the rollings and turbulence of present things–as both a look above them and a look beyond them; above them–to the steady and loving hand by which they are ruled; and beyond them–to the sweet and beautiful end to which, by that hand, they will be brought.” “The Great Counselor,” says Thomas Brooks, “puts clouds and darkness round about Him, bidding us follow at His beck through the cloud, promising an eternal and uninterrupted sunshine on the other side.” On that “other side” we shall see how every apparent rough blast has been hastening our boats nearer the desired haven.

Well may I commit the keeping of my soul to Jesus in well-doing–as unto a faithful Creator. He gave Himself for me. This transcendent pledge of love–is the guarantee for the bestowment of every other needed blessing. Oh, blessed thought! my sorrows are numbered–by the Man of Sorrows; my tears are counted–by Him who shed first His tears, and then His blood for me! He will impose no needless burden, and exact no unnecessary sacrifice. There was no unnecessary drop in the cup of His own sufferings; neither will there be in that of His people. “Though He slays me–yet will I trust in Him!” “Therefore comfort one another with these words.”

John MacDuff, “The Words of Jesus”)

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here

Not a member yet? Join us!