Posts Tagged ‘Attitudes’

Men Whose Tongues are Sharp Swords

Tuesday, June 13th, 2017

 Men, whose tongues are sharp swords? Yes, some men have tongues like that. Maybe you date men, whose tongues are sharp swords or you’re married to one. What do you do to stop that abusive behavior?

Denial

Maybe you look the other way and pretend nothing is happening. Your family, friends, and coworkers see and hear it, but you can’t look at it. If you admit your spouse has a tongue like a sharp sword, then you must do something about it. The thought of confrontation and the work involved not to tolerate that abuse any longer may overwhelm you. It may seem easier to deny it.

“Cindy” stayed in an abusive marriage for years. She told me, “I thought all men talked to their wives that way. I didn’t think I could do anything about it.” 

Minimization

On the other hand, you may admit you date men, whose tongues are sharp swords, or you’re married to one. Perhaps you recite the children’s rhyme: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me.”

That isn’t true. Because of that abuse, you may suffer a broken heart, a crushed spirit, and a lack of self-respect.

You may say, “It’s not so bad. At least he doesn’t hit me. He’s never beat me up.”

He does beat you up with his mouth. Ask your children. They know, and it hurts them to see the way your husband disrespects you.

Rationalization

Perhaps you make an excuse for your husband. You say that he’s tired and works hard. Thousands of people are tired and work hard, but their tongues are not sharp swords.

You yourself may feel tired. You may work a full-time job outside of the home and another one at home. You clean house, shop for groceries, do the laundry, cook the meals, take care of the children, help them with their homework, and take them to their activities. Yet, your tongue is not a sharp sword.

Call to Action          

For your sake and that of your children, get into a free support group at a domestic violence shelter or seek individual counseling from someone who specializes in domestic violence.

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All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission.
Yvonne is a Speaker, Author, Counselor, Cancer Survivor and
serves on the Board of Directors of Christians in Recovery.
She is the author of
“Moving from Broken to Beautiful: 9 Life Lessons to Help You Move Forward”
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It is a fact of life!

Friday, May 5th, 2017

It is a fact of life, that all of our thoughts, words, and actions are fixed and unchangeable.

Now, at the age of seventy, my work for good or for evil is done.
I cannot go back and repair what has been amiss.
I cannot now do what has been left undone.
I cannot do in a better manner, what has been imperfectly performed.
I cannot recover the hours that have been wasted.
I cannot correct the evils which may have resulted from my errors.
I cannot overtake and stop what I have spoken or written, as it has gone out into the world.
I cannot summon back the opportunities for usefulness which have been neglected.
I cannot obliterate the reality or the memory of wrong thoughts, or wrong motives, or wrong words, or wrong actions.
All that has been thought or said or done in these seventy years, has become fixed as a reality–never to be changed.
Past errors and follies may be forgiven–but they are never to be changed.

The hope of a man at seventy years of age–at any age–is not that the errors, and sins, and follies of the past can be changed–it is only . . .
that they may be pardoned by a merciful God;
that they may be covered over by the blood of the atonement;
that though they must remain forever as facts–facts fully known to the Great Searcher of hearts–their guilt may be so taken away that they will not be punished;
that by the blood shed on the cross, they themselves may be so covered over–so hidden–that they will not be disclosed on the final trial before assembled worlds!

That hope, the religion of Christ offers to all.

How different would men try to make their lives, if they habitually felt that all–literally all–that they do, or say, or think–even their most fugitive thoughts–becomes thus fixed and unchangeable forever!

~Albert Barnes, “Life at Three-score and Ten” 1868

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God Cuts and Polishes His Jewels

Tuesday, May 2nd, 2017

“They will be Mine in the day when I make up My jewels!” Malachi 3:17

God has many sharp-cutting instruments and rough files for the polishing of His jewels. Those He especially loves and means to make the most resplendent–He most often uses His tools upon! (Robert Leighton, 1611-1684)


Jewels are polished for the sake of removing specks and blemishes from them. They are often cut and polished on purpose to make them look more beautiful. If a large diamond is to be put on the crown of some great king, it is only by cutting and polishing that it can be made to shine with all its brilliance.

When you look at a diamond, you see that it has many faces or sides. These don’t belong to diamonds naturally. When they are found in the mines, they have none of these smooth faces. They are then like little pebble-stones, without any particular shape. These smooth, even sides are made by the jeweler, by grinding and polishing. And they are made on purpose to make the diamond look more beautiful.

In the same way, God cuts and polishes His jewels in order to make them shine more brightly and beautifully in the crown of His glory in Heaven.

Sometimes we see good Christian people who have very heavy trials which they are obliged to bear for many years. And when we see them bearing those trials, we often wonder what it is all for.

God is using those trials just as the jeweler uses the files and wheels–to polish His jewels so as to make them brighter and more beautiful in Heaven.

There was that poor beggar at the gate of the rich man, of whom we read in the New Testament. He was left to be so poor, and to have all those dreadful sores, not because God could not help it; He could easily have made him a rich man and have kept him from having any sores at all, if He had so pleased. But Lazarus was one of God’s jewels, and God was making use of his poverty and beggary and sores–in order to polish that jewel and make it shine more beautifully in Heaven!

All of God’s jewels need polishing!

“I have refined you in the furnace of suffering!” Isaiah 48:10

(Richard Newton, “Bible Jewels”)

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Are You Like This Bee?

Friday, April 28th, 2017

“Lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God” 2 Timothy 3:4

Did you ever read of the bee in the fable, that found a pot of honey, and thought it would be fine to save all the trouble of flying about the meadows and gathering its sweet stores, little by little, out of the cups of flowers?

Soon it went in the pot and reveled in the sweets; but when it began to get tired and cloyed, it found–poor bee!–that its wings were all clogged and would not open, nor could it drag its body out of the mass. So it died, buried in pleasure!

There are many people, like this bee, who find death in their pleasures!

“You have lived on earth in pleasure and self-indulgence. You have fattened yourselves in the day of slaughter!” James 5:5

~Dr. Edmund

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The Devil’s Beans!

Wednesday, April 26th, 2017

The other day I was going down the street and I saw a drove of pigs following a man. This excited my curiosity, so that I determined to follow. I did so, and to my great surprise I saw them follow him to the slaughterhouse! I was very anxious to know how this was, and I said to the man, “My friend, how did you manage to induce those pigs to follow you here?”

“Oh, did you not see?” said the man; “I had a basket of beans under my arms, and I dropped a few as I came along, and so they followed me.”

Yes, and I thought, so it is–the devil has a basket of beans under his arm, and he drops them as he goes along, and what multitudes he induces to follow him to an everlasting slaughter house! Yes, friends, and all your broad and crowded thoroughfares are strewn with the beans of the devil!

“Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes!” Ephesians 6:11

~Rowland Hill

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A Bag, a Book, and a Bottle!

Friday, April 7th, 2017

God takes great care to comfort His people in their many trials and sorrows in this world. One of the goals which He commands His preachers to have, is the comfort of His people. He says, “Comfort, comfort My people.” Here are three things described in the Word of God that should be of great comfort to every believer.

1. God has made A BAG FOR OUR SINS. Job said, “My transgression is sealed up in a bag, and you sew up my iniquity.”  In ancient times when men died at sea, their bodies were placed in a weighted bag which was sewn together and sealed. Then they were cast into the depths of the sea.

That is what God has done with our sins. They are cast “into the depths of the sea.” When Christ died for our sins which were imputed to Him, He put them all away. They were buried in the sea of God’s infinite forgiveness, put away never to be brought up again. God almighty will never charge us with sin, impute sin to us, remember our sins against us, or treat us any less graciously because of our sin. That is the forgiveness of God! “Blessed is the man to whom the Lord will not impute sin.”

2. The Lord has written A BOOK FOR OUR NAMES. Take heart child of God. Your name is written in the book of God! Before the worlds were made, the Lord God inscribed the names of His elect in the Lamb’s book of life. In that book God has recorded, not only the names of the chosen heirs of Heaven, but also all things pertaining to them. The Lamb’s book of life is the book of God’s eternal purpose of grace, predestination, and election. The fact that our names are written in that book means that our salvation is a matter of absolute certainty, and that all things work together for our good by God’s arrangement to secure our predestined end, which is perfect conformity to Christ. When our Lord says, “Rejoice because your names are written in Heaven,” He is telling us that we have nothing to fear. All is well with those whose names are written in Heaven.

3. Moreover, the Lord God keeps A BOTTLE FOR OUR TEARS. “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in Your bottle. You have recorded each one in Your book.” It was customary at ancient Egyptian funerals for mourners to have a small cloth or sponge to wipe away their tears. Then they were squeezed into a small vial, a tear bottle, and placed in the tomb with the dead, symbolizing the care the mourners had for the one who had died. Even so, the Lord our God, our heavenly Father, our almighty Savior, and our holy Comforter tenderly cares for us. We are the very apple of His eye.

The Lord our God has . . .
put our sins in a bag and buried them,
written our names in a book to remember them, and
placed our tears in a bottle to show His tender care for us.

Could anything be more comforting in this world of sin, sorrow, and death?

~Don Fortner

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Hardship and Divine Providence

Wednesday, April 5th, 2017

A merchant was one day returning from market. He was on horseback, and his saddlebag was filled with money. The rain fell with violence, and the good old man was wet to his skin. At this he was vexed, and murmured because God had given him such bad weather for his journey.

He soon reached the borders of a thick forest. What was his terror on beholding on one side of the road a robber, with leveled gun, aiming at him, and attempting to shoot him! But the gunpowder being wet by the rain, the gun did not go off–and the merchant, giving spurs to his horse, fortunately had time to escape.

As soon as he found himself safe, he said to himself: “How wrong was I, not to endure the rain patiently, as sent by Divine Providence! If the weather had been dry and fair, I probably would not have been alive at this hour, and my little children would have expected my return in vain. The rain, which caused me to murmur, came at a fortunate moment to save my life and preserve my money!”

And thus it is with a multitude of our afflictions. By causing us slight and short sufferings–they preserve us from others far greater and of longer duration.

“We know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose!” Romans 8:28

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What is True Repentance?

Wednesday, March 29th, 2017

I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’ So he got up and went to his father.” Luke 15:18-20

Notice the spirit of deep self-abasement in the resolution which the prodigal made.

True repentance is intensely personal. The prodigal felt it was his own sin. I have sinned!” He can scarcely see any sin but his own. He sees his own sin in the very worst colors. Study the fifty-first Psalm. See how David again and again speaks. It is my transgression, my iniquity, my sin ever before me.

True repentance beholds the wrong done to God by sin. The prodigal felt that his sin was primarily against God. It was a breach of His holy law. It was opposition to His holiness. It was sin against His goodness, and against redeeming love. So David cries in his bitter sorrow, forgetting for the moment the wrong he had done to Uriah–in the far greater wrong which his sin had done to God: “Against You, You only have I sinned, and done this evil in Your sight!”

True repentance makes no excuses.
The prodigal seeks for no palliation, no covering, no cloak. He says nothing of the circumstances which led him to do evil, or of companions who had drawn him aside. He does not attempt to shift the burden from his own shoulders to that of others. He makes no self-justifying pleas–he has too much sorrow, too much true brokenness of spirit, to desire or attempt it. One thing, and one thing only, he sees–his own terrible fall, and his own exceeding guilt.

True repentance takes the very lowest place. Once to be a son was not enough for him–but now he will be content even to be a slave or a hired servant! He feels utterly unworthy. As Jacob felt: “I am not worthy of all the mercies You have showed me.” As the centurion felt when he sent to Jesus: “I am not worthy that You should come under my roof.” So did the young prodigal esteem himself: “I am no longer worthy to be called your son.”

Be sure that God delights in the humble and contrite soul.
Lift yourself up in pride and self-satisfaction–and God will assuredly cast you down.
Cast yourself down in humble confession of your sin–and God will assuredly lift you up.
“God resists the proud–but gives grace unto the humble.”

But we see here the purpose of the heart accomplished. The young man not only made the resolution, but he kept it, So he got up and went to his father.” He turned his back forever on that far country and his old companions–and turned his face homeward. Doubtless it was with many a tear, with many a bitter feeling of regret for all that had passed–since in so different a spirit he had trodden that path before. Yet onward he trudges with weary heart and weary footstep, in the hope that a place may still be found for him in his father’s house.

Do you ask, What is repentance? I can scarcely better describe it than from the path of this wanderer. It is turning the back . . .
on sin,
on the ways of the world,
on the lusts of the flesh,
on the service of the devil.

And it is turning the face God-ward, Heaven-ward, confessing all that is past, looking upward for grace to live holier, with one single desire–to abide in the fear and love of God.

~ George Everard, “Welcome home! Plain teachings from the story of the Prodigal” 1871

Suffering from Perpetual Frustration?

Monday, March 27th, 2017

This morning I saw that the house needed cleaning in a very big way. And I created this little hell inside my own head. I made an issue of the fact that the house is a mess allowing myself to get upset and let the adrenaline roll. This, in turn, lead to physically getting into a tither. The mess in the house was the trigger but I created the hell inside of me and it exploded to an outward physical tornado. This is an example of what I think the author was getting at in the article Self-created Hells.

This quote from the article struck me: “entitlement plus unrealistic demand equals perpetual frustration.” Now I do not think of myself as an entitled person but I feel I am entitled to some form of “normalcy” in life. Of course, God always tosses in valleys, mountains, storms….

Life is not normal. There is no such thing as normal. But I do feel entitled to this “normalcy” whatever that is. When my life is turned upside down I have a choice on how I react to it. But my choices have ramifications. If I choose badly that self-created hell springs up.

Bad choices = self-created hells

Sometimes I am forced into making choices by circumstances, people, places etc. and I do not have the luxury of time to think things over and make the best choice. A choice just has to be made. And under pressure, wrong choices are made thus resulting in self-created hells.

But I can’t allow myself to get into a trap with this…. or an endless cycle of:
choice > hell > choice > hell

Jesus is there to break the cycle…..He is peace….. He is serenity……The last thing he wants is for you or I to be in some form of hell. He leadeth me beside the still waters…..He maketh me to lay down in green pastures…He restoreth my soul…..That is Christ…. So when I feel myself slipping into a hell i have to put on the breaks and seek Him.

Too often I am trying to climb straight to the top of the mountain (I am talking about a huge, boulder encrusted peak). But God provides those switch-back paths that wind their way back and forth for us to trod upon. The way is far longer but the grade is gradual and manageable. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. God can reduce any mountain to a gradual path. The summit is still attained.

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~ * ~
Copyright by S. O. Brennan.
All rights reserved. Used by permission.
S.O. Brennan is the Director of
Christians in Recovery and Alcoholics Victorious

When Should You Seek Justice?

Friday, March 24th, 2017

roman jailPaul and Silas were beaten and tossed into prison illegally.

God intervened and used the opportunity to convert the jailer and his household. It’s a cool story until the following morning when the city officials try to get Paul and Silas to leave without making a fuss about their unlawful punishment.

Why not leave well enough alone? They’ve already been flogged and thrown into a dungeon. Why risk embarrassing the city leaders again?

But Paul said to the officers: “They beat us publicly without a trial, even though we are Roman citizens, and threw us into prison. And now do they want to get rid of us quietly? No! Let them come themselves and escort us out.” (Acts 16:37)

Paul wasn’t after retribution or vengeance. He didn’t demand a public beating or some sort of punishment for the officials who’d broken the law. But he also knew he needed to confront his persecutors.

Paul decided to set things right. He decided to seek justice, even at the risk of his personal safety.

The bible says the magistrates were alarmed when they learned Paul and Silas were Roman citizens and they came to appease them. Perhaps Paul used the opportunity, as he did earlier with the jailer, to demonstrate grace and forgiveness. I don’t know.

What’s certain is that it’s always the right time to seek justice, to balance the scales and set things right.

The trick, at least for me, is to make sure I’m balancing God’s scales rather than mine. It’s awfully tempting to get self-righteous about my personal USAmerican sense of justice which is usually about punishment or some version of getting even and doesn’t have much to do with what Jesus had in mind.

ALWAYS SEEK JUSTICE

Now all I have to do is be aware of injustice, understand what it means to correct it, and summon the courage to act regardless of risk.

That’s all. Sure glad Jesus is along in case I miss a step or two.

Your thoughts?

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Dixon
Copyright by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.
Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance
. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com