Archive for the ‘Attitudes’ Category

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Are You Watching in Hope?

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2012
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Micah 7:7: “But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.”

I sometimes struggle to watch in hope for the Lord. Do you? Yet that is how God wants us to watch.

The father of the prodigal son watched in hope for him to return. When the son returned, Luke 15:20 says, “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son.”

That is an example for us on how to watch in hope and wait for God to answer us. We can wait in confidence because the verse ends with “My God will hear me.”

Perhaps we need a job or a car, salvation of a loved one, return of a prodigal, healing from trauma, or the end of destructive behavior such as overeating, unforgiveness, drinking or drugging.

Whatever the request is, we can watch in hope, wait for God our Savior, and know that he will hear us.

Dear God, help me watch in hope for the Lord. Amen.

Application: What will you ask God for this week?

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Copyright 2010-2012, Yvonne Ortega, LPC, LSATP, CCDVCAll Rights Reserved. Used by Permission.
Yvonne is a Speaker, Author, Counselor, Cancer Survivor and
serves on the Board of Directors of Christians in Recovery.
She is the author of Finding Hope for Your Journey through Breast Cancer.
If you would like to have her speak for your organization or church, please contact her through
her website: http://YvonneOrtega.com

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Posted in Ability to Overcome, Anxiety, Assurance, Attitudes, Choices, Faith, For Friends & Family of Dysfunctional People, General Recovery, New Beginning, Pain, Pastors & Recovery Pros, Responsibility, Step 12, Step 2 | No Comments »

What are You Known By?

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012
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Be Known By…

…what you’re for (not by what you’re against).

Today’s guidance: Be known by what you’re for (not by what you’re against).

Nobody wants to be a victim. Sometimes we pretend we’re victims, or even choose victim status, to avoid accountability, but you’re probably not actively seeking ways to be a better victim.

You don’t ever get complete control. That’s God’s job, so get over the illusion that you can control events or people. You can’t.

But you can develop influence. It’s a lot more subtle and long-term, but you can impact people and circumstances. Or you can choose to be a victim. Victims surrender influence.

There are three ways to influence what happens around you.

Consume. Other folks want your attention and your money, and they’ll do just about anything to get it. When you buy and use products and services, you encourage others to produce more of them. When you give your attention, you encourage others to do more of whatever you’re paying attention to.

Criticize. Your disapproval encourages others to do less of something, or to do it differently.

Consumers and critics can exert a certain amount of influence, but there an important “if”—these activities change things if others listen to and care about your choices and opinions. If you’re in the target audience or the right demographic, your consumer decisions might influence what’s produced. If you yell loudly enough or stand on the right platform, your criticism might cause someone to re-think.

Or maybe not, because consume and criticize are passive and reactionary. Someone else makes a choice, and you react. And if the other person doesn’t care about your response, you  have no influence. Here’s an extreme example.

I choose not to buy cocaine—nobody cares. I criticize those who produce and sell cocaine—no impact. As a consumer or critic I have absolutely no influence on cocaine production and distribution. Fortunately, there’s a third option.

Create. Creators stand for something.

Don’t criticize someone else’s idea. Develop a better one.

Don’t gripe about negative media coverage—while you continue to watch. Go out and do something that highlights and celebrates the abundant generosity and service in your community.

Don’t lament the lack of effective ministry in a particular area. Start your own, or get involved and improve what’s already happening.

Don’t tear down opponents. Create something so powerful, compelling, and attractive that your opponents will want to join.

Creating, building, standing for something—it’s hard work. It’s not a quick fix. It requires preparation, determination, and perseverance. And it requires ignoring the consumers and critics who will inevitably try to knock you off course.

Consumers and critics influence through motivation. They stand in the back and use money or power or fear in an attempt to coerce or force change and tell someone else what to do.

Creators lead. Creators show the way. They’re the risk-takers, the ones in front.

Be a creator. Be a builder.

Be known by what you’re for (not by what you’re against).

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of: Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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Posted in Ability to Overcome, Attitudes, Choices, For Friends & Family of Dysfunctional People, General Recovery, New Beginning, Pastors & Recovery Pros, Renewal, Responsibility, Step 12 | Comments Off

When You’re Not Sure What To Do…

Monday, May 21st, 2012
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…help someone.

Inevitably, you’re going to reach places where you feel stuck and don’t know which way to turn or what to do next. You’ll wonder about God’s purpose and whether there’s any point to it all.

Maybe you’re looking for the right person and nothing seems to be happening. Perhaps you’re seeking a job and can’t seem to get past square #1. You’ve tried everything and just don’t know what to do next.

Help someone…with no notion of what’s in it for you. Find somebody who needs what you have to offer and help them. Volunteer.

God created us for service. It’s how we’re wired. When you use your gifts and passions to help someone, you’ve living in your sweet spot. You’re intentionally moving to the space for which God designed you.

Helping fosters humility. When nothing seems to be going right, it’s easy to lose perspective. Helping someone reminds you you’re not the center of the universe.

Helping demonstrates compassion. You’re following the Bible’s repeated command to care for others.

When you help someone, you’re automatically generating in yourself the attitudes that allow you to be your very best self. You’re doing the very things for which God wired you.

When you’re stuck, that’s a pretty good place to turn. Ironically, focusing on others is likely the very best way to find your own path as well.

When you’re not sure what to do, help someone.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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Posted in Ability to Overcome, Attitudes, Choices, Faith, For Friends & Family of Dysfunctional People, General Recovery, Pastors & Recovery Pros, Responsibility, Step 12 | Comments Off

You’ll Never….. Love too much.

Friday, May 18th, 2012
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It’s awfully easy to go overboard, even with good things. Almost any idea or action, taken to extremes, will get you in trouble. Most of the time, moderation is the way to go.

I know of one clear, absolute exception:

You’ll never love too much.

A legal expert once tested Jesus (Matthew 22) by asking, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

In response, Jesus’ first word was, “Love…” Then He completed the thought.

“’Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Love is the one thing about which we’re supposed to be extreme. Jesus tells us to put everything—heart, soul, and mind—into love.

I think Jesus frequently shakes His head as He watches me stumble along. I suspect He often asks, “What were you thinking?” as I get myself into yet another mess.

But I’m pretty certain He never says, “You loved too much in that situation.”

One caution: we overuse the word “love” until it almost loses any meaning. I love my wife, but I also love baseball and my dog. Let’s hope I express “love” for Becky and baseball differently. Otherwise I’ll be sleeping in the dog house.

Jesus referred to agape, the kind of sacrificial love that’s a decision rather than a feeling. Your heart, soul, and mind were made to be filled with agape.

You’ll make lots of mistakes. Even when you try to do it right, you’ll miss the mark. Give yourself lots of grace. Get used to messing up, because it’s part of life. But…

You’ll never love too much.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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Do you feel like you are loosing your mind?

Thursday, May 17th, 2012
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And at the end of the time I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my understanding returned to me; and I blessed the Most High and praised and honored Him who lives forever:
For His dominion is an everlasting dominion,
And His kingdom is from generation to generation (Daniel 4:34, NKJV).

Have you ever caught yourself saying something like, “I think I’m losing my mind”? I have, and it’s usually because my brain is overloaded with multi-tasking. All I really need to do is slow down a bit and things come back into focus.

It wasn’t that easy for the once great King Nebuchadnezzar, who had gazed upon his empire and boasted that it was all of his own doing. God quickly gave the arrogant ruler a reality check, driving him out into the fields to eat grass with the animals. It wasn’t until he lifted his eyes to heaven that his understanding returned to him and he finally gave glory to God, recognizing Him as the sovereign ruler over all.

How easy it is to become like Nebuchadnezzar and gaze out over our own little kingdoms (home, family, occupation, possessions) and begin to think that we’ve achieved it all in our own strength! And how important it is to keep our eyes lifted toward heaven so we don’t do such an evil thing! Apart from God’s mercy and grace we could not take our next breath, let alone amass fame or fortune. May we never be so foolish as to think we are in charge of anything, for it is only in Him that we “live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:28).

Personally, I find that very comforting, don’t you?

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article !
Copyright 2009-2012 Kathi Macias, all rights reserved. Used by permission.
Kathi Macias is a multi-award winning writer who has authored 30 books.
“Beyond Me. Living a You-first Life in a Me-first World”

and


“Mothers of the Bible Speak to Mothers of Today”

She also writes novels:

No Greater Love

More than Conquerors

The author can be reached at: http://www.kathimacias.com

Posted in Ability to Overcome, Assurance, Attitudes, Choices, For Friends & Family of Dysfunctional People, Pastors & Recovery Pros, Responsibility, Step 3 | Comments Off

Restore

Monday, May 14th, 2012
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Today’s word-of-the-week…

RESTORE

Restore: return to a former place or condition.

I wrote a while back about The God Of “Re” and all the “re-” words associated with God. There’s a long list of God-related words with the common “re” prefix.

“Re” means again (repeat) or new (refresh). God is all about new beginnings. The God of “re” offers renewal, reconciliation, resurrection …

Restore is definitely a God word.

So my handcycle’s “restored”—returned to its former place in my garage. I’m happy for that outcome.

But I begin the week with gratitude that God’s entire story is about sending His son to restore us to right relationship with Him. Thanks to Jesus, we can be back where God designed us to be.

Have a great week.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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Hearts And Wineskins

Wednesday, May 9th, 2012
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Jesus often rebuked those with “hard hearts.”

Our pastor used the phrase “hard hearts” in a message this weekend. He suggested that we should strive to cultivate a “soft heart.” I wondered exactly what he meant.

My dictionary defines softhearted as “tenderness of heart, capable of pity or other kindly affection.”

I’m not sure that’s exactly what Jesus had in mind.

And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins. (Mark 2:22)

I once saw a time-lapse video demonstration of this principle. A fresh new wineskin is pliable and elastic, so it can expand to accommodate the gas emitted as new wine ferments. The new wine can literally burst a brittle old wineskin.

That’s a picture of how Jesus viewed soft and hard hearts. A soft heart is like the new wineskin. It’s able to listen, assimilate new ideas and truths, and accept those who think and behave differently. A soft heart is characterized by tolerance, an open mind, and the ability to accept correction. It values people over ideas.

A hard heart demands conformity. It’s a “my way or the highway” attitude that insists on strict adherence to rules at the expense of liberty. Hard hearts refuse to acknowledge any alternative custom or opinion. Their interpretation, their revelation, is the final word in any discussion.

Hard hearts create rigid, joyless religion. They reduce Jesus to regimented lists of ideas and single-issue arguments. They value winning and being right.

Jesus condemned hard hearts by comparing them to brittle old wineskins. He came to bring a new truth that values people over rules and tolerance over blind conformity.

Jesus told us to keep our hearts flexible and open, willing to listen and be led by His spirit in surprising new directions.

I hope my heart is a new wineskin. You?

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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I Love A Happy Ending

Tuesday, May 8th, 2012
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The Stolen Handcycle Chronicles rolls to a happy ending.

Friday morning a Fort Collins police detective called with the happy news that they recovered the bike. Thanks to diligent work by law enforcement—supported by a huge circle of prayer—this episode offered about the best possible conclusion.

(If you’re unfamiliar with this saga, check out When Someone Steals and Adversity And Opportunity.)

This whole story exemplifies what I said along RICH’S RIDE. Media and political interests too often portray us as selfish, bitter, and divided. But we encountered nothing but generosity, support, and eagerness to help.

I’m committed to turning off the negative voices with a vested interest in highlighting and promoting divisive messages.

My community—and the world in general—aren’t characterized by one person who made a poor choice.

I choose instead to see the hundreds of folks who jumped on Facebook to publicize and help secure the bike’s return. I choose to see police officers who might have filed this as one more insignificant crime, but instead pursued leads and took great personal joy in reporting their discovery. I choose to see reporters who worked to tell the story and showed up today to document the happy ending.

See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? (Isaiah 43:18)

I perceive those who offered prayers, encouragement, and financial assistance if I had to replace an expensive machine. I’ll focus on the opportunities, the added exposure this incident generated for our upcoming ride from Cincinnati to Washington, DC.

Who knows how many people will become aware and perhaps even donate to support the important work of International Justice Mission? (That’s a not-so-subtle hint if you want to click this link and check out the details.)

We’re invited to perceive the new things, the good, abundant things God’s doing all around us. That’s the city—and the world—in which we live.

Becky and I are sad for the person who took my bike. Even before the bike’s return we expressed our hope that this event becomes a catalyst for change and restoration.

But I refuse to allow one mistake to become a distorted lens through which I see my neighborhood, my community, or my world.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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Adversity and Opportunity

Monday, May 7th, 2012
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I hope it doesn’t seem like I’m dwelling on a relatively minor incident, but this week’s handcycle theft provides an opportunity. Bouncing Back is, after all, partly about confronting and overcoming adversity. If we learn from small bumps, perhaps we’ll do a little better when something really big happens.

Some  observations:

“Why” would someone take a handcycle? That’s probably the most frequent question, and I asked it as well. But the search for “why” is a fool’s errand and one of the enemy’s most powerful tools.

First, there probably isn’t an answer. Likely it was a random crime of opportunity, as senseless as most other crimes. “Why” seeks rationality where it probably doesn’t exist. Accidents happen. People make foolish decisions. Mostly it’s just the way it is.

More importantly, “why” doesn’t matter, and an answer wouldn’t help. Suppose I could know the thief had a good reason for his act—would it really help? It’s like demanding a reason for a senseless disease or for my accident. If God explained why those occurred, would the pain or loss or grief be reduced?

“Why” also implies “why me” or “why you.” Those questions subconsciously point at someone else and ask “why not him instead.” I didn’t deserve to have my bike stolen, but I also didn’t deserve immunity from the consequences of a broken world. Maybe a better question is “why not me.” I haven’t earned any exemptions.

“Why” keeps me focused on the past. Better, I think, to lean on God’s promise (Romans 8:28) that all things work together for good. It won’t eliminate the grief process—nothing can do that. But it does allow us to move forward with authentic hope, a confident expectation based on faith.

This is why we prepare. We know adversity’s going to happen, somehow, sometime, in some form. When I get to know God and understand His character, when I practice walking with Jesus, I’m training. An athlete trains for the trials of competition so he can face them well. This sort of spiritual trial is similar.

Anyone can coast downhill, just as anyone can be thankful during easy times. When the hills come and adversity stares us in the face, we have the greatest opportunity to live out difficult principles.

Being real and transparent is part of this circle’s covenant, and I’m not pretending to be Pollyanna. Of course I’m angry and frustrated. Of course I feel violated and a bunch of other emotions.

But this is an opportunity to choose intentional response over reflexive reactions. It’s not about denial, it’s about acknowledging and trying to make better choices.

I want to forgive, though I don’t feel forgiving. I want to be thankful even in the places that don’t feel like it. I want to believe God will use this for good, though it sure doesn’t feel very good right now.

I want to love the person who took my bike when “loving” is about the last thing I feel.

I want to act on the hope that God will use this poor choice to soften a heart, even if I never see any evidence in the form of a returned bike.

That’s the cool thing about hope. Hope allows you to believe, despite the evidence, and then watch the evidence change.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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When Someone Steals

Friday, May 4th, 2012
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It’s a shock.

I went to the garage yesterday morning and noticed an empty space. My first thought was, “Where’d I put my handcycle?” as though I might have simply misplaced the seven-foot-long, bright yellow machine. It took a moment to assimilate the fact that someone stole my handcycle.

Then there’s some anger, that someone would walk into my garage and steal something so meaningful. Of course the thief didn’t think about what the bike meant to me, but that’s what I wondered.

Then there’s fear. A person bold enough to go to the back of the garage and maneuver such a conspicuous item around obstacles and out of our neighborhood…while we watched TV a few yards away…what else might have happened? It’s a real sense of vulnerability and violation.

There’s frustration, at the thought of replacing such a customized machine. I thought about ordering, sizing, fitting, waiting for manufacture, and then getting it all adjusted and dialed in. With a ride scheduled in a little more than two months, I wondered whether I’d be able to honor my commitment.

But then there’s perspective, once the police left and there was time to reflect. It’s just a thing. Yeah, it’s a special thing, but it can be replaced. Nobody got hurt, no permanent damage to anything that really matters.

I remembered something I wrote during the ride: Life’s determined more by choices than by feelings.

I want to choose gratitude, even though I don’t feel entirely grateful. I’m thankful the thief just took a replaceable thing rather than entering the house and perhaps doing something much worse. I’m glad he escaped without detection, avoiding a potentially dangerous confrontation with us or our neighbors.

I’m grateful for supportive friends and neighbors, for a community where this sort of occurrence isn’t the norm.

Mostly I’m thankful for the perspective to value people more than things. I’m sad for the thief, for whatever internal demons led him to steal. I truly don’t wish him any harm or bad karma or whatever else people call it, because I suspect he’s already fighting plenty of personal battles.

I hope he realizes his mistake and returns the bike. I’d love the opportunity to thank him for reconsidering. I know it’s unlikely, but God touches hearts in unlikely ways.

And if it makes sense, I’m grateful for the ability to choose thankfulness over bitterness, even when that’s not how it feels right now.

CIR Members can share their thoughts regarding this blog here
Don’t miss CIR’s Daily Article ! Dixon
Copyright 2008-2012 by Rich Dixon, All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.

Rich is an author and speaker. He is the author of:

Relentless Grace: God’s Invitation To Give Hope Another Chance. Visit his web site www.relentlessgrace.com

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