A Christian Woman in a Domestic Violence Relationship?

Psalm 55:4: “Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me.”

Besides National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, October is also National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Our church members aren’t exempt from breast cancer. Neither are they exempt from domestic violence.

Some men in the church use submission as their excuse to ridicule, punch, kick, curse, name call, and deprive their wives of family, friends, and the necessities of life. Outside of the home, those men seem nice and loving.

Psalm 55:12-14 explains the confusion and fear a woman feels:

If an enemy were insulting me,
I could endure it;
if a foe were raising himself against me,
I could hide from him.
But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend,
with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship.

Your immediate reaction may be to ask why she doesn’t leave the relationship. First of all, she loves the man and wants to keep her marriage and family intact.

The batterer may have apologized and promised not to abuse her again. Statistically, those apologies and promises don’t last long, but she clings to them.

Secondly, shame and guilt overwhelm the abused woman. He has told her if she would clean house better, fix a good meal, be a better wife and mother, he wouldn’t have to hurt her. She thinks it’s her fault.

He tells her she is ugly and dumb, and no one would want her. He threatens to keep the children if she leaves him.

Dear God, help me sense the fear of an abused woman. Amen.

Application: What will you do this week to befriend an abused woman?

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Copyright 2010-2013, Yvonne Ortega, LPC, LSATP, CCDVC
All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission.
Yvonne is a Speaker, Author, Counselor, Cancer Survivor and
serves on the Board of Directors of Christians in Recovery.
She is the author of Finding Hope for Your Journey through Breast Cancer.
If you would like to have her speak for your organization or church, please contact her through
her website: http://YvonneOrtega.com

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