Also see:             Frequently Asked Questions

The following questions and their answers link to the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association (BGEA) web site. This does not imply an endorsement of BGEA and its related ministries by CIR or visa versa. Abortion I have had an abortion and feel so guilty. Can God forgive me? I'm single and pregnant, and I'll probably get an abortion, although I don't want to. My ex-boyfriend talked me into getting an abortion. I know God won't forgive me. Our teenage daughter just told us she's pregnant. I've never been in favor of abortion, but I'm beginning to wonder. What would you advise? My boyfriend claims the Bible says children born out of wedlock can't go to heaven. Is he right? Support Groups for Women Who Have Had an Abortion ABUSE How can I overcome the effects of the abuse I suffered as a child? I can't ever forgive my father for physical and emotional abuse and leaving my mother. My father has been rude and verbally abusive all his life. I believe in honoring our parents, but I've had enough. Recently, a church-going man in our community was convicted for molesting his daughters. How could something like this happen? I have a very hard time believing that God loves me because my own father was abusive. How can I believe in God's love? Why do some people never seem to learn from their mistakes? I have a friend who got into a really abusive relationship with someone last year, and now she's about to fall into the same situation with someone else. I've tried to talk to her, but she just doesn't get it. What can I do about the harsh and hurtful things my husband says to me? We're believers and attend church, but when my husband gets angry he sometimes hits me. What should I do? Would it be all right to marry if my boyfriend promises to change and control his temper? I know Jesus said to love people, but how can you love someone who has really hurt you? ACCOUNTABILITY Why Should I Be Accountable? When we sin, who is responsible—us or the devil? What role does accountability play in your Christian walk? ADDICTION I had a lot of stress in my life, and instead of turning to God I turned to alcohol. I wonder if I've become an alcoholic. Can God help me out of this pit? The doctor has me on a painkiller that I take in strong doses for chronic back pain. I'm scared that I'll get addicted. Should I be taking this drug so much? I struggled with alcohol most of my life, until I gave my life to Jesus. But I don't go to church much because I don't fit in. I'm in my 40s now and I know I've made a mess of my life with drugs, but is it too late for me to get back on track? I wish I could live my life over again. I've lost everything I ever had because of drugs: not just my money, but my family, friends, health and self-respect. How can I help my friend who's gotten involved in some very destructive habits? How can I find freedom from addiction? I know I need to stay away from drugs and alcohol, but beyond that, how can I reform myself? My recovery program says I need to write to people we've hurt and apologize to them. But the only people I've hurt are ones who hurt me first, like my abusive parents. What good would it do to apologize to them? My spouse may be getting addicted to pain killers. What should I do? Our son has been in and out of alcohol treatment programs since he started drinking in college. But they never did any good, and now we don't even know where he is. ANGER Is it ever right to be angry at someone? How can someone who's very nice one minute explode in anger the next? I know anger is a sin, but I can't seem to help it. I'm not like this most of the time, but when things don't go right I can't help but be angry about it. Do I just learn to live with this, or what? My neighbor was diagnosed with cancer, and all it's done is make her angry at God. Someone hurt me very badly a couple of years back and there just isn't any way I can stop hating him for what he did. I'm ashamed at the way I got angry the other day, and I know I've let down the Lord. How Can I Control My Anger? I don't see what's wrong with being angry at someone, as long as you don't hurt them or anything like that. I knew being divorced and becoming a single mom would be hard, but what I didn't expect was the desire to strike back. I'm always getting into trouble because of my temper. I've even lost two jobs because of it. Is there anything I can do? ANXIETY / FEAR / WORRY What can I do to find relief from my worries? How can I deal with the fear and anxiety that makes me want to stay home all the time? I'm told Christians shouldn't worry, but I just can't help it. Is it a sin for me to worry so much? I know Jesus told us not to worry about the future, but I can't help but worry. Any advice? I worry about my kids. Am I just a worrywart? Can God help me overcome my fears? I'm always worrying about what might happen to me or my children. I can't help worrying. The world is a pretty scary place, and a lot can happen. Am I wrong to be concerned? BAD HABITS & BEHAVIOR I'm always making promises to God about how I'll stop my bad habits and become a better person, but nothing ever seems to last. I get discouraged because I can't seem to conquer some bad habits, and I wonder if God is going to give up on me. If God will forgive us for anything we do (no matter how bad it is), then why should we try to be good? How can some people be good Christians for a while, but then they turn their backs on it and wander into all sorts of bad things? Do you have any surefire cure for bad habits? CONTROLLING MY THOUGHTS How can I control my thoughts and get rid of all the junk that passes through my mind? How can I control my thoughts about other people? The Battle for Your Mind I get all kinds of things going through my head but I can't seem to control them. Is it wrong to keep your thoughts about people to yourself, instead of telling them what you really think? How can I empty my mind of all the useless thoughts I have so I can hear God speaking to me? I have thoughts of ending my life. Where can I find help? DEPRESSION I've struggled with depression since I was a teenager. I've prayed and prayed, but God doesn't seem to care. What have I done to deserve this? Is it a sin to be depressed? The doctor says I have a chemical imbalance that can be treated with medication, but my friend says I just need to pray and have more faith. My doctor says I need medicine for my depression but I'm afraid to do it. I have a friend who says I just need to pray and get close to God. Is it wrong for someone with a strong faith in God to take pills for depression? I have just gotten over depression and a suicide attempt. How do I know I won't slide back into this again? Sometimes I feel so depressed in the morning that I can hardly get up. What should I do? DISCOURAGEMENT As a disabled person, how can I avoid falling into self-pity and despair, when I know I'm never going to get better? I've been unemployed for over a year, and I've given up even looking for a job. How can I get out of this pit? Sometimes I feel so depressed in the morning that I can hardly get up. What should I do? EATING, FOOD, DIET I guess I'm just addicted to food. Will God help me somehow? Our niece is very thin, but thinks she is too fat. How can someone deceive herself so much? Does the Bible say anything about obesity? I know I'm seriously overweight, but I don't seem to be making much progress. Finding Freedom from Eating Disorders FORGIVENESS OF GOD I still have a lot of garbage left over from my old life. God must be very upset at me. I became a Christian two months ago. But I know God must be very angry at me now, because I've done something I know I shouldn't have done. Have I lost my salvation? I grew up in a fine Christian home with loving parents, but I threw it all overboard. Is God too fed up with me to forgive me? FORGIVENESS OF OTHERS Didn't Jesus say someplace that we ought to turn the other cheek when people do something bad to us? Isn't that unrealistic? I know we're supposed to forgive people who've hurt us, but I'd rather get even. How should we respond to criticism? I admit I get angry and respond in ways I probably shouldn't. How many times does God expect us to forgive someone who hurts us? Is it possible to forgive someone, when you can't really forget all the hurt they've caused you? GAMBLING Is it appropriate for a Christian to gamble? I work in our county's department of social services, and I see families all the time who've been torn apart because of a gambling addiction. I've gotten in over my head financially because of gambling. I'm afraid my wife will leave me if she finds out. HEALTH I'm in poor health (heart problems) and I'm very worried about dying. Is it wrong for me to feel this way? I have cancer. I have so many fears. What should I do? What do I have to do to get God to heal me? How concerned should we be about our health? I've just been diagnosed with breast cancer, and it's really sent me into despair. Why is God punishing me? My cancer is in remission, but I'm afraid it's going to return. How can I cope with this? I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and I'm very discouraged. I'm tired all the time and don't have any energy—even to go to church. I'm terminally ill. I wish I had lived differently. Is it too late for me? I have AIDS. Can God help me? I've prayed and prayed for God to heal me, but nothing happens. Why won't God answer? How do you know if God healed you of something or if it was the medicine? I've just been diagnosed with an incurable disease. Can you give me a reason not to kill myself? HOMOSEXUALITY Does the Bible approve of some homosexual relationships? I struggle with homosexual feelings and temptations. Does God hate me? What can I do? Our little boy only wants to play with little girls and act like them. Does this mean he is a homosexual? Are homosexuals born that way? I have a loved one who is gay. Where can I find help? Why does religion always seem to oppose things like sexual freedom? LONELINESS / ACCEPTANCE BY OTHERS My wife died two years ago, and the hardest part has been the loneliness. Am I doomed to be lonely the rest of my life? I left home for a job and I've never felt so lonely. Should I just give up and move back? How long does it take to get over the death of a loved one? I'm the only one left in my family. Sometimes I feel so lonely I even think about taking my own life. I feel so isolated. I'm the only one in my family who's a Christian, and every weekend they all go out drinking while I stay at home. How should I deal with this? MENTAL HEALTH My husband says I'm a perfectionist, but didn't Jesus tell us to be perfect? MONEY & DEBT I have prayed for God to help us get out of debt. Why doesn't God do something? Is He punishing us? Is it wrong to pray for money for our medical expenses? Is having lots of money a sign of God's blessing? Money & Marriage My husband and I ar so far in debt from credit cards that I don't see how we'll ever get out. I'm scheduled to retire in a couple of years, and all of a sudden I've realized I haven't saved enough money. We're over our heads in debt, but my spouse won't stop spending money. I'm about to give up. PRAYER Why Doesn't God Answer My Prayers? Is it wrong to pray for money for our medical expenses? I've prayed and prayed for God to heal me, but nothing happens. Why won't God answer? How does one pray? I've never been taught how to say a personal prayer or really talk to God. Why should we bother to pray, when God already knows what we need? I know I ought to pray more, but it seems like every time I try to pray my mind begins to wander. How do I know God answers prayers if nothing happens? What good does it do to pray? In spite of all our prayers, things just seem to be getting worse, not better. How do I pray properly? Is there a secret to praying? RELATIONSHIPS & MARRIAGE I knew being divorced and becoming a single mom would be hard, but what I didn't expect was the desire to strike back. How do you know when to give someone a second chance, and when to let them suffer the consequences of what they've done? I have been married for three months, and I'm wondering if we made a bad mistake. Wouldn't it be better to get out now? How do you know when to hang on to a bad marriage and when to move on? My husband has been almost like a different person in recent months, with wide swings in mood. What can I do? My husband and I work different sifts, so we almost never have any real time together. We need the money, but this is really causing problems in our marriage. What can we do? I'm so confused and heartbroken...my wife announced our marriage was over because she'd found someone else. What can I do? I wish my spouse and I knew each other better before we got married. Now we're getting divorced. RIGHT & WRONG I think it's ridiculous to say there is such a thing as right and wrong. Can't every generation make up its own mind what is wrong and what is right? There are lots of things that people used to think were wrong that are widely accepted today. If God will forgive us for anything we do (no matter how bad it is), then why should we try to be good? WWhat if we do something wrong and we don't realize it's a sin? Is God still displeased? What's wrong with shading the truth a little bit when it isn't going to make any difference, as long as it doesn't do any harm. Is it OK to tell little lies as long as they don't hurt anyone? Or is every lie wrong? I don't see any harm in a little gossip, as long as you aren't telling lies about people...but you think all gossip is wrong. But what is your reason for saying this? SALVATION I became a Christian two months ago. But I know God must be very angry at me now, because I've done something I know I shouldn't have done. Have I lost my salvation? I've tried to be a good person, but I'm not sure if I've been good enough to get into heaven. What can I do? I'm not a good person, and I'm not worthy of going to heaven. What can I do? Can you explain salvation to me? Can a person be saved more than once? I committed my life to Christ when I was a child, but now I wonder if I'm really saved. Friends have told me I need to give my life to Jesus, but I don't know how. I don't want to be left out of heaven. How can I know if I've been good enough? A friend told me once that the Bible says we won't sin once we become a Christian. Is that true? SEX, PORN God is helping me break free from Internet porn. It's still a struggle I just can't seem to overcome Internet pornography, and I'm scared to death my wife will find out. I don't know how I got into this so deeply. Why does religion always seem to oppose things like sexual freedom? SUFFERING / HARDSHIP Do you believe God curses some people with bad luck all their lives? If God is in control of everything, why do bad things happen to us? I can understand why God lets bad things happen to people who are evil, but why do bad things sometimes happen to good people? Suffering: Why Does God Allow It? We lost our home and almost everything in it to a fire and it has been devastating. When something bad happens to us, how do we know if God sent it to test us and make us stronger, or if the devil sent it to discourage us or make us doubt God? This has been a very bad year for me. Can you give me any hope for the future? Why Does God Allow Suffering? SUICIDE I have thoughts of ending my life. Where can I find help? I've just been diagnosed with an incurable disease. Can you give me a reason not to kill myself? My friend committed suicide after a long battle with mental illness. I feel so guilty, because I should have seen the signs of what was happening and tried to help him but I didn't. I have just gotten over depression and a suicide attempt. How do I know I won't slide back into this again? Is suicide the unpardonable sin? How can I be sure I won't become suicidal again? Will God help me? I'm the only one left in my family. Sometimes I feel so lonely I even think about taking my own life.