Daily Articles

Jailed Twice Before I was 18 for Selling Drugs

I grew up in an alcoholic family. Both my father and my mother came from alcoholic homes as well. I lost a brother to a drunk driving accident. He was 24. Because I grew up in such a very chaotic home, I was running the streets from an early age.

I had my first drinking experience was when I was just twelve years old. I was "turned on" to pot at age fourteen, and went to jail twice for selling marijuana, hashish, and LSD, before I was eighteen years old.

I Realized I was No Longer in Control

My name is Michael, and I am an alcoholic. I have been sober for over 15 years now. I once said this: "Almost from day one I was scared and I have been scared ever since." That is not true anymore. Yes, I do have fear, but I know, in Jesus name, where that fear comes from and how to handle it. Knowing this is a miracle. I once hid behind alcohol and other things in order to avoid the fear.

I came out of hiding when I sobered up and boy was I scared. All I could do then in my early sober life, as I do now, is to give that fear over to Jesus. It hurt horribly, and often still does…to have that kind of fear and insecurity and lack of faith in myself. Coming out of hiding was the hardest thing I ever did. It hurt like hell, and it was very scary. But I have handled things better and better now for over 1,923 sober days. It hasn't been easy, but then is life ever easy?

I bought into this with my Lord Jesus on the morning of October 22, 1994. I was sitting on a bench in front of Rizzoli's book shop in Williamsburg, Virginia. The family was out and about in the stores. In Rizzoli's I had just perused through a biography of Jack Kerouac, the famous author of "On The Road", which was a defining book of my teenage years. I remember when Kerouac died up in Massachusetts when I was a graduate student there. All of the pictures recording his life, particularly the later ones, showed Jack with a bright gleam in his eye. He was a major drinker. He did not get past 50. He bled to death from his esophagus. The actor Peter Lawford bought it that way too.

Jesus Waited for Me Despite My Years of Drinking and Smoking

I was born in Africa to missionary parents who wanted and loved me. They raised me in the church to believe in God. When I was 4 years old, we came to America and lived in the Southwest where my father was a minister, my mother a school teacher. There was only one thing "dysfunctional" in my childhood -- "Me". School work was easy, making superficial friends was easy (we moved around a lot). I was however, overweight and extremely self-conscious about that. I felt like I never fit in --. I became a rebel and the class clown to get attention. We moved to Indiana when I was 16. It was at that time that I dedicated my life to Jesus Christ but then - life happened and in the course of "finding myself" I gradually strayed away.

I began smoking and drinking alcohol. My first experience with alcohol at the age of 17 was when a friend let me taste vodka! I loved the way it made me feel! And promptly bought some so I could drink as much as I wanted. I started driving home while drinking that bottle and passed out somewhere on a back road. A friend came along and took me home. My father called the sheriff and they walked me and kept me awake until I walked most of it off. The Sheriff asked me where I got the bottle and I wouldn't say because even as I was dry heaving and sick as a dog, I knew if I told where I got it I wouldn't be able to go back and get more!

I drank whenever I could and as often as I could from that point on but, I was the proverbial country bumpkin in that I didn't know people that drank, I didn't have money to buy it with and I didn't know much about drinking. So it was pretty limited then. Suffice it to say that when the opportunity arose, I drank alcoholically - never just to be social. I drank to get drunk because it made me feel slim and pretty and all of the other things I didn't feel.

God Worked Powerfully in My Life

In the late sixties, long before I committed to follow the Lord, God delivered me from an intense IV Meth addiction. There were no withdrawal symptoms of any kind, I simply stopped.

In the mid-seventies, I lived in a hippie-type community in Pennsylvania. I smoked as many packs of cigarettes a day as I could get my hands on. Filtered or non-filtered, it didn't matter. When I ran out of cigarettes, I rolled my own with Blue Bugler, the cheapest package tobacco you could by at that time. I looked physically fit, but every morning, I woke up congested with phlegm and I could not walk up a flight of stairs without stopping several times to catch my breath.

One day, while I cleaned a bushel of cherries, a friend stopped by and left an unopened, fresh pack of Pall Malls on the table. Normally, I would consider this like found money, a rare and glorious event. But for no obvious reason, I had no desire to smoke and never opened the pack. After that day even the smell of tobacco was revolting to me. I remained baffled by this dramatic release that was not achieved through any effort on my part. However, I continued to smoke pot.

A few years later, we settled down in New Jersey. My husband worked hard at two jobs and I worked for an airline. We had a new house, bought a new car and both daughters attended a good school. We traveled often and stayed at the best hotels, all practically for free, because of my job benefits. But in fact, I drank too much, smoked dope and struggled with my inability to stop.

Lisa and Gambling

Addiction is a powerful bondage that binds us to the sins of the world. It is an evil spirit that is sent by Satan into our lives to deceive us and destroy our lives ever so slowly. It is like a long, long line that he has hooked us with and is ever so slowly reeling us closer and closer. When you get close enough he has you in his grasp forever. All the fun that you thought you were having along the way is over and you live a life of hell.

Some people choose to commit suicide as they begin to feel the pain of his hook pulling and tugging them in. They kill themselves to try and escape the destruction that they feel in their lives. Little do they know that by pulling the trigger or popping the pills that they are caught for everlasting eternity and cast into hell. Satan smiles as he puts another soul into his net.

There are many types of bondage's or addictions in the world that Satan tries to hook us with: alcohol, drugs, sex, and gambling are some of the big ones. No matter what your addiction is, no matter how long you've been bound to it, it is not too late to get released and free from it. Don't let Satan reel you in any closer! Break free from that line and get away while you can! But you ask, "How?" How do you free yourself? Let me tell you. You cannot do it by yourself. You have to have help. You have to ask for help and then be willing to receive your rescue.

I was a gambler. That was my bondage. I was very addicted to the game. Horse races, casino's, the lottery, etc.

Alcohol, Homosexuality, Broken Family & Marriage - Christ Healed them All

It was Feb. 21 10:00A.M. I stood, outside my home, drinking orange juice mixed with white wine. Now days I was drinking a little over 1/2 gallon of wine per day. To say I was bewildered is an understatement. I felt numb or a better description is, I felt dead inside.

I had read every self help book around. I tried rejoining the church of my youth hoping their rule of total abstinence from alcohol might save me. It didn't. I was drinking more then ever and teaching Sunday school with a hangover. I was 40 years old and had now been drinking alcoholically for 20 years.

From Alcohol and Drugs to Jesus

At the age of 26 I became independent for the first time. That is when I started to abuse alcohol and drugs. Then in July my mother passed away. This was devastating for me and I was unable to cope with her death. I started go to the bars and hanging around with the wrong crowd. I did everything I could to make these people like me in order to try and fill the void that I was feeling. I even gave them money and so that they could use it to support there addiction while I was still supporting my own addiction. I let them use me so they would be my friends.

During these times I was drinking constantly and doing drugs which made me extremely suicidal. I started getting in trouble with the law because of the alcohol and drugs. I was also in and out of the hospital because I was drunk all the time and suicidal. There where many times I woke up and don't know how I got to where I was. In 1989 I started going in and out of the alcoholics anonymous program. Over time I tried many different recovery homes, but I always left the program. I was never ready to give up my addiction so none of these programs worked for me.

I Survived Sexual Abuse at the Hands of My Father

Hi. My name is Laura.

I have gone through an immense amount of healing, and would like to share it.

From the time I was 4 to the time I was 12, I was sexually abused by my father. His abuse was violent and varied, ranging from rape to bleach poisoning to gagging, choking, and tying me to the bed while abusing me.

When I went into counseling at age 14 for emotionally induced seizures, I could no longer stand it and had to tell someone. At that point, I was on the verge of a multiple personality disorder. I thought I belonged to the darkness and always would.

Prayer is Like Breathing

    "Praying is like breathing; it is part of the Christian's life and basic to it. It is more than formal prayer, important as that is. It is a continual openness to God in all our being. Instead of talking to ourselves as we go through the day, we talk to God, sentence prayers, momentary calls for help, grace, or strength, quick words of thanks, or expressions of need, all this and more. Such constant sentence praying gives us the greatest freedom and advantage in prayer, because it is the practice of the presence of God, of our awareness of it. Its greatest reward is the growing awareness that God is closer to us than we are to ourselves. (Systematic Theology, p. 7204)

This is akin to what St. Paul wrote to the Philippians:
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" Phil. 4:6-7 All anxiety can be dissolved into a godly peace that serves as an impenetrable wall to your heart and mind. My father used this practice of a continuous conversation with God to do more than guard his own heart-he used it to triumph over the spirit of the age:

Living a Double Standard

My feelings of guilt and shame towards a same-sex attraction began at an early age. I experienced frequent sexual abuse from an older male friend during most of my teen years, and hustling for money soon followed.

Years later, I was baptized in a Mennonite Brethren church as a public declaration that I would follow Christ. My secret desire was that maybe now my attraction and sexual fantasies towards men would disappear. They didn't, and the fantasies soon turned into years of acting out behaviours.

I attended several MB churches in different provinces over the years, all the while living a double standard. I became addicted to cruising public places that were well-known to the gay community as places where homosexuals could meet for anonymous sex – a behaviour very typical of this community. Frequenting gay bars was a given.

Life in the gay community has been tumultuous and everything but a happy time. I would be in the arms of a lover on Saturday night and then actively participate in a worship service on Sunday morning. My life was such a lie – a secret I was able to maintain for many years.

Your membership & donations make this ministry possible.
If you have been helped please:

Join Us  or  Donate

Contact Us

Syndicate content