Discovering Real Love

Writing to those loved by God the Father, called and kept safe by Jesus Christ. Relax, everything's going to be all right; rest, everything's coming together; open your hearts, love is on the way!...But you, dear friends, carefully build yourselves up in this most holy faith by praying in the Holy Spirit, staying right at the center of God's love, keeping your arms open and outstretched, ready for the mercy of our Master, Jesus Christ. This is the unending life, the real life! Jude 1b-2, 20-21, The Message


We are always changed by our experiences of being loved by God. As we Practice His Presence we will be gently challenged as to what we believe about love. Our wounds associated with love will be "being healed" as we practice his presence.

The first front of healing in our journey as Son's and Daughter's; is to become empowered to more fully receive love from Father. "Be Loved!"

Ephesians 1:5-9 The Mirror

He is the architect of our design; His heart dream realized our coming of age in Christ. (See Galatians 4:1-6 "...and to seal our sonship the spirit of His son echoes Abba Father in our hearts.")

His grace-plan is to be celebrated: He greatly endeared us and highly favored us in Christ; His love for His Son is His love for us. (We are His love children!)

Since we are (fully represented) in Him, His blood is the ransom that secures our redemption. His forgiving us our sins measures the wealth of His grace.

This grace shown towards us communicates a wisdom and discernment of our worth that completely surpasses any definition.

The secret is out! His cherished love-dream now unfolds in front of our very eyes.

Also, as we journey toward a more mature love, we will begin to see how our contribution to others will start becoming the bigger part of love. We love because we want to be an expression of who Jesus is for us. We begin to love without strings or thought of reward. Following is some of what love will look like as we heal and mature. As we Practice the Presence of Jesus our previous love experiences will become greatly challenged in the fresh light of His love.

We discover in Him: Love gives permission to change and supports the process. It does not wait on the sidelines until change is complete before it rejoins the relationship. Love is a willingness to share the journey and be part of the story. Life can be a comedy, a tragedy, usually a drama, always an adventure, and unfortunately, occasionally a soap opera. Real love always plays a leading role, never a bit part. Following is the truth to substantiate His love for us!

Ephesians 3: 16-19, The Mirror

I desire for you to realize what the Father has given you from His own limitless resources, so that you may be dynamically reinforced in your inner being by the Spirit of God.

This will impact your faith with capacity to fully grasp the reality of the indwelling Christ. You are rooted and founded in Love. Love is your invisible inner source just like the root system of a tree and the foundation of a building. (The dimension of your inner person exceeds any other measure that could possibly define you.)

This is your reservoir of super human strength which causes you as saints to collectively grasp (come to terms with, make one's own) the limitless extent of His love in breadth, in length, in height (rank), and the extremities of its depths.

I desire for you to become intimately acquainted with the love of Christ on the deepest possible level, far beyond the reach of a mere academic, intellectual grasp. Within the scope of this equation God finds the ultimate expression of Himself in you (so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God)."

We want excitement, not boring predictability, yet we often fail to understand that real love is mostly about how we overcome circumstances, not how we avoid them. Life is unforeseen, unpredictable, and made up of pleasure and pain. To navigate the twists and turns of our journey without using love as a compass and guide, means we will neither discover nor become the relational equivalent of True North. This is the most genuinely true alignment that can exist in the harmony between us and God.

His love does not accept a negative. It will challenge fear in an appropriate manner. Love stands up for love. The evidence of our lack of love is that we are afraid to be hurt or rejected. That can mean that we relate to people in the present so as to prevent ourselves from being hurt, as we once were in the past. That is dysfunctional and sad. We are governed by a present/past mindset that is protective in a completely wrong way. Perfect love casts out fear. The antidote to fear is to fully understand the power of love.

Love is not about opening yourself up to another. It is choosing to be your real self no matter what occurs. Love is about how we love, not who loves us. "I am what I love, not what loves me." His true self secures our heart to God as the ultimate focus of our love; even as we are the focus of his love. This will become the most powerful identity statement that can ever be made about us. It will produce a freedom that revolutionizes your relationships.

Real love cannot be rejected, because it never seeks a return. Love is not an investment. It is the right thing to do. It is a part of our righteousness. That is, it is not just about doing the right thing, but more about being the right person. His love within calls us to be true to ourselves and love others.

Love relates to people's potential rather than their actual nature.

Love overcomes our own hurts and wounds. How do we love someone when love is not returned? In exactly the same way as if it were! We love for the joy of loving.

Love means that we don't have to "fix" people. We simply resource them with how we see them, think about them, and value them. When we do something for someone else without the need for recognition or gratitude it will benefit the giver as much as the recipient. Love expressed increases.

Love does not control another's destiny nor stifle their identity. We are learning to love openly and generously. Love that is founded on dependency can become toxic. We can suffocate people with our expectations and demands. We can over-protect like a security blanket that smothers people and allows them no freedom to discover life.

Love releases people. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. It is not our responsibility to change people but to give love freely and without strings. We earn the right to give advice. Loving-kindness opens up the door of trust.

We are accepted in the Beloved. The Father has put us into the place of His truest love and utmost affection. He put us into Jesus. He loves us exactly as He loves Jesus, even though we are at this time very different in lots of ways.

We are learning to be made in His image. In the process of learning, we are loved as though we have made it! Being in Christ is a paradox. We are in Jesus with all the benefits of being like Him while we are learning to become as He is.

With true love, the process is as good as the end result! God gives love not by measure, but in fullness. Therefore, if we are worthy of love to begin the process, the same love that empowered us to start will compel us to finish. There are no degrees in the love of Heaven. Love is love, God is love, and so are we.

The Inheritance revised Jonathan David Helser & Graham Cooke

Copyright by Ron Ross.
All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Rev. Ron Ross is a pastor, author, teacher, and counselor.
As founder of NET Casting Ministries, he equips the church
around the world to care for the wounded and addicted.
Ron is a cofounder of the NET Training Institute.

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