Self-Examination

Moving from Passive Victim to Active SeekerPremium Content

Curiosity has its own reason for existing. Albert Einstein.

I’ve been thinking a bit (an unusual and dangerous development) about the notion of overcoming adversity. As a paraplegic, I’m often asked questions like: How did you deal with it? How did you get past it? What helped you move forward?

When I recall twenty-one years of adjusting to life in a wheelchair, first impressions include frustration, anger, and isolation. Each challenge seems to elicit a sense of impossibility and hopelessness, and my initial reaction is capitulation. It’s as though I’m programmed to greet difficult circumstances with: I’ll never be able to …

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Save Your Marriage By Starting With a Clean SlatePremium Content

If you really want to save your marriage, you must start with a clean slate. That means to get rid of the worldly attitudes and practices that have polluted your marriage and follow God’s plan for your marriage instead. We’re so used to treating our marriage like everyone else does, or the way we were taught, or from what we think is the right way to handle it, but look where all that has gotten many of our marriages of today.

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Heal Marriage After AdulteryPremium Content

Do you want your marriage nursed back to health? If you want your marriage restored it will take some effort on your part. Stop peering over the fence at your neighbor, and put your eyes back in your own yard where they belong.

First, the offended spouse needs to forgive completely (see my article, forgive a cheating spouse), and secondly the offender has to understand why he strayed from the marriage bed in the first place. Infidelity is only a symptom of a greater problem within the framework of the marriage.

If you have been unfaithful or have anything else pulling you away from your spouse, ask yourself why? What am I doing that would cause me to be disloyal? Don’t blame your spouse for your weakness. Grow up and take responsibility.

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Soft Addiction and AccountabilityPremium Content

SELF-ACCOUNTABILITY
The key to overcoming bad habits or a Soft Addiction is to take the time to learn how to become self-accountable. If a person is not held accountable for something, there is little motivation to change. We, who struggle with behavior addictions can relate to this problem. It is a main element of denial. It is getting into the habit of saying, Who, Me!

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Are You Trapped Behind an Open Door?Premium Content


I saw a catchy phrase yesterday that summarized the way I seem to live a good deal of my life: trapped behind an open door.

A story’s told of Houdini once being challenged to escape from a jail cell. After he was placed in the cell and left alone, he removed a thin strip of metal concealed in his belt and began working at the lock. But no matter what he tried, he couldn’t unlock the door.

The great magician had been tricked, because the door was never locked. All he had to do was open it, but his belief that the door was locked was sufficient to confine him.

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When We Wrestle with OurselvesPremium Content

It's really hard to keep remembering that my fight isn't against those around me who oppose me, but rather is about whether or not I can stand in the will of God. Sometimes, I think, that the devil, he is me, that when I look into the mirror, my worst enemy is my own desires. I simply have a hard time waiting and waiting is what I need to do to allow God to work in the lives of those around me to do His will for me.

Ephesians 6:11-12 NKJV

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Where Are You Going?Premium Content

I once knew a guy who went on a road trip with the express purpose of traveling rather than arriving. He was determined not to be driven by a destination, so whenever there was a choice of which way to go he turned left. I suspect it was a politically motivated scheme, but he had a pretty interesting trip anyway. He probably missed some interesting sights, but he also saw some things he might have otherwise passed up.

This week our pastor (Jeff Lucas) talked about “the God of the journey.” He observed that God is always about moving, going somewhere, and that He doesn’t just sit back and point like a celestial traffic cop. In Jesus He actually journeys with us.

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Begin With WhyPremium Content

Have you ever looked back and wondered, "Why in the world did I do THAT?"

sign

Sometimes that’s my whole life. I’ve wondered at times about getting the question tattooed on my forehead.

Last time we looked at the deadly self-infection of Results Syndrome. When I’m motivated by immediate results, I often find myself wondering (too late) why I did something so dumb.

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Signs of Gambling Addiction

1. Loosing track of time when you gamble

2. Gambling with money needed for essentials (food, clothing, utilities, mortgage, etc.)

3. Often gambling more money than you intended.

4. Having few interests outside of gambling.

5. Hiding any of the following from your friends, family and/or loved ones:

    -- your gambling
    -- the amount of time you spend gambling
    -- the amount of money involved

6. Trying to win back money you have lost (continue to chase your losses).

7. Betting with money you can't afford to lose.

8. Maxing out your credit cards and/or borrowing money in order to gamble

9. Compromise your personal values in order to keep gambling.

The Role of Hope in Counseling Eating DisordersPremium Content

In the biblical counseling course I am currently taking, the point is made that counselees will often say that they have prayed about the problem (read: sin), but that is all they have done. Their general hopelessness comes from the fact that nothing in their situation has changed; they are still enslaved; from all appearances, God has not moved. Does He not see or care? From their vantage point, prayer must be ineffectual. This often leads to hopelessness.

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